TBS - East

Neighbors (Danny DeVito, Matthew Broderick) in a New England town go to war after one adorns his house with enough Christmas lights to make it visible from space.

Malcolm Turner (Martin Lawrence) and his stepson (Brandon T. Jackson) go under cover at a girls school of the performing arts to flush out a killer.

Monica fears Chandler has a sexual fetish involving sharks; Phoebe fears losing her boyfriend.

Phoebe grows famished waiting for her tardy chums to show up at her birthday dinner; Rachel frets about leaving Emma with a baby sitter.

Ross mocks Rachel's new male nanny (Freddie Prinze Jr.); Chandler becomes upset when Monica says that somebody from her job is the funniest guy she's ever met.

Chandler and Joey find a videotape while checking out Richard's apartment; Ross sings Emma an off-color lullaby.

Rachel has a bone to pick with her self-centered sister (Christina Applegate) on Thanksgiving; Monica protects her good wedding china; Joey forgets to join his TV cast mates for the Thanksgiving parade.

Rachel impulsively gives her telephone number to a handsome guy but worries he will call when Ross is there.

Monica fears the worst when she learns Chandler will be spending Christmas in Tulsa working on a deadline with a beautiful co-worker (Selma Blair).

Rachel crosses swords with her temporary replacement (Dermot Mulroney) at the shop; Phoebe wreaks havoc on the set of Joey's soap opera.

Monica invites Rachel's workplace rival (Dermot Mulroney) to her birthday party; Joey flirts with Emma's new nanny (Melissa George); Phoebe and Mike (Paul Rudd) take care of a litter of rats.

Monica exults in the applause she receives on karaoke night, unaware that the cheering audience can see through her blouse.

Joe Dirt (David Spade) returns with a mop in his hand and a mullet on his noggin. The white-trash hero embarks on a journey through the American heartland and time itself as he finds himself caught in the past.

Thor must battle the Hulk in a deadly gladiatorial contest and prevent the all-powerful Hela from destroying his home world and the Asgardian civilization.

Sheldon goes to extremes to keep Leonard and Penny happy when they stop speaking to each other.

Sheldon invites a famous physicist to the apartment, and competes with Leonard for her attention.

Leonard tells Penny about how he met Sheldon and what happened to the elevator.

Raj and Howard set up an online dating profile for Sheldon and find the perfect woman.

Penny tags along on Sheldon's first date; Wolowitz finds a new use for a robotic arm.

Realizing he will not live long enough to download his consciousness into a robot body, Sheldon tries to extend his life span.

When Sheldon searches for an alternative to human companionship, the guys become concerned.

An embarrassing secret of Wolowitz's is revealed; Raj and Sheldon get into a war at work.

Leonard realizes he is the only one in his group without a girlfriend; Sheldon wants to get rid of his girlfriend.

Leonard keeps an affair a secret from Sheldon, Howard and Raj.

The new teams are thirsty; a team of PDA-loving first responders and another team begging Jackie Chan to adopt them are all competing for a chance to win $25,000.

Thor must battle the Hulk in a deadly gladiatorial contest and prevent the all-powerful Hela from destroying his home world and the Asgardian civilization.

Joe Dirt (David Spade) returns with a mop in his hand and a mullet on his noggin. The white-trash hero embarks on a journey through the American heartland and time itself as he finds himself caught in the past.

Forced to join a mentorship program, two irresponsible men (Seann William Scott, Paul Rudd) must help a pair of impressionable boys navigate the troubled waters of youth.

Helping a homeless man traps Urkel and Carl in a bomb shelter.

A cool fraternity tells Eddie to lose Steve as a friend.

In a Halloween tale, Urkel is a medieval duke battling vampires.

On the golf course, Steve accuses Carl of kissing up to his boss; Laura misses her curfew.

Sheldon dismantles the refrigerator to stop it from humming; he gets a paper route to pay for its repair.

Sheldon becomes jealous when Dr. Sturgis bonds with Paige, another 10-year-old genius; Mary invites Paige's family over for a playdate.

When Mary's faith is shaken by a tragedy in the community, Sheldon becomes an unlikely ally.

When George Sr. asks Sheldon to keep a secret from Mary, the stress of not being honest drives Sheldon to hide out at Tam's for his first sleepover.

When Dr. Sturgis recommends Sheldon and Missy for a university research study on twins, Mary is unhappy when the test results go to Sheldon's head.

A video game takes over Sheldon and Meemaw's life; George Sr. is jealous when Georgie bonds with Herschel at the auto shop.

Joey and Phoebe conspire to send Rachel and Ross on disastrous blind dates.

Joey stumbles upon a way to impress a famous actor (Jeff Goldblum) during an audition; Ross learns the identity of a long-ago mugger; Chandler accepts an internship at a shoe company.

Both Monica and Chandler secretly approach Joey for a loan; Phoebe invites Mike (Paul Rudd) to move in with her; Rachel baby-proofs the apartment.

Ross and Chandler trade barbed insults on their alma mater's Web site; Phoebe's resolve not to call ex-boyfriend Mike (Paul Rudd) weakens.

The gang buys scads of lottery tickets for the multimillion-dollar jackpot; Rachel suspects baby Emma is on the verge of saying her first word.

Rachel's visit to a soap opera set inspires her to dream about Joey; Chandler takes Ross on a weekend getaway after Monica cannot take time off from work.

Ross invites an attractive paleontologist (Aisha Tyler) to a rooftop "Days of Our Lives" party being thrown by Joey.

Monica and Chandler run into an old acquaintance when they secretly go to a fertility clinic; Ross helps Joey woo the same professor (Aisha Tyler) he wants to date.

Monica and Chandler interview unsuspecting candidates, hoping to find the right man to father their baby.

The gang heads to Barbados for a paleontology convention where Ross is the keynote speaker; David (Hank Azaria) prepares to propose to Phoebe, but ex-boyfriend Mike (Paul Rudd) is not yet out of the picture.

The gang heads to Barbados for a paleontology convention where Ross is the keynote speaker; David (Hank Azaria) prepares to propose to Phoebe, but ex-boyfriend Mike (Paul Rudd) is not yet out of the picture.

In Barbados, Monica, Chandler and Phoebe eavesdrop on their friends' passionate encounters; Monica styles her hair to look like a blowfish; Phoebe and Mike rekindle their romance.

Sheldon's interview with the FBI jeopardizes Wolowitz's security clearance.

While the guys camp out for a long-awaited movie screening, Penny and Bernadette invite Amy to her first slumber party.

Penny asks Leonard to lie to her father (Keith Carradine); Howard, Raj and Bernadette pull an all-nighter at a telescope.

Amy realizes she has feelings for Penny's ex; Koothrappali and Wolowitz try to prove who would be a better superhero.

The guys try to bond with Penny's new boyfriend through a costume contest.

Leonard's idea for a smartphone application causes friction in his friendship with Sheldon.

Bernadette runs into her ex-boyfriend (Rick Fox) while attending a science event with Wolowitz.

Sheldon takes acting lessons from Penny in hope of becoming a better teacher; Koothrappali fantasizes about his friend's girlfriend.

A wealthy donor makes Leonard question what he is willing to do for science.

Wolowitz considers taking things with Bernadette to the next level; Leonard and Raj's sister rekindle their relationship.

Sheldon is upset when he realizes Leonard is the center of their group of friends.

Leonard has to choose between Penny and his new girlfriend, Priya; Howard's magic trick drives Sheldon crazy.

Steve feels isolated when he dislikes a new fast food restaurant popular among his friends; Stan and Francine attempt to return misdelivered mail.

When a storm hits Stoolbend, Langley Falls and Quahog, the Smiths must fight tooth and nail to survive.

Roger becomes overzealous after he is made Steve's legal guardian; Francine and Stan are disappointed when they visit the world's biggest water park.

Stan convinces his friend to get married so he can get a shot at being a best man; an encounter with Ricky Martin shakes Roger's self-confidence.

When Stan tries to bond with Steve by creating a busty female alias (Sarah Michelle Gellar), Francine must intervene; Roger starts a limo service.

Francine is jealous when Stan runs into a woman he had a crush on; Steve encounters good luck after accidentally wearing Hayley's underwear to school.

Father Donovan (Martin Mull) casts Stan and Roger in a Christmas play at the mall; Jeff and Hayley adopt a kid who turns out to be possessed.

Steve follows in Roger's footsteps and takes on a superhero persona to prove he is a macho man; Francine receives shocking news.

Stan's 30 years of hard work should fulfill his dream of getting into the golf club, but he is devastated when Steve gets accepted first.

When Stan joins Steve and Roger's fictional detective agency, he proves to be extremely incompetent at his job.

Royalty is gracing the course as the Prince and Brynn try to add $25,000 to the royal coffers.

Urkel, who fears water, must pass a mandatory swimming course.

Steve and Myra run into trouble when they pull over to park; Carl thinks he is a lousy lover.

Carl and Urkel must land a plane after their vengeful pilot bails out.

Richie (Bryton McClure) invites a homeless man for Christmas; Steve (Jaleel White) performs an angelic act for Laura (Kellie Shanygne Williams).

Steve and Eddie eat Waldo's final exam, a cake; Carl has some news about his boss' girlfriend.

Urkel heads a bone-marrow drive to help a classmate who has leukemia.

Mary clashes with Sheldon's drama teacher over plans for a Halloween fundraiser for the church; Georgie falls for a rebellious teenage girl whom Sheldon is tutoring.

Sheldon gets into trouble with fellow child genius Paige at the science museum; George Sr. is forced to play therapist to Paige's bickering parents; Mary, Georgie and Missy help Meemaw with a garage sale.

Sheldon studies his family for a psychology project; a Thanksgiving dinner turns into a family fight when George Sr. is offered a job in Oklahoma.

When Sheldon learns that people with stunted childhoods can turn into social outcasts, he tries to act like a kid; Meemaw and Dr. Sturgis' relationship is tested when she teaches him how to drive.

Sheldon experiments on Missy; Georgie joins Mary's bible study to spend more time with his crush, Veronica.

Sheldon uses his new friendship with the school bully to boss Georgie around; Missy steals Meemaw's makeup for picture day.

Ross drinks too much alcohol at dinner with Rachel, Joey and Charlie; Frank Jr. (Giovanni Ribisi) cannot cope with his precocious triplets.

Rachel and Joey nervously anticipate their first real date; Monica and Phoebe try to avoid an obnoxious friend (Jennifer Coolidge) with a fake British accent; Ross emerges from a tanning booth with a two-toned appearance.

Rachel gets Monica and Chandler to delay their trip to Vermont for Emma's first birthday bash.

Rachel convinces her sister (Christina Applegate) to baby-sit over Ross' protests; Joey writes a letter to an adoption agency on Monica and Chandler's behalf.

When Ross interviews with Charlie's ex-boyfriend (Greg Kinnear) for a prized grant, the doctor makes a shocking stipulation; Chandler lies about watching Joey's bizarre audition tape.

Monica and Chandler fuss over their apartment as they expect a visit from the adoption worker (Maria Pitillo); Phoebe and Mike opt for a small wedding and donate the extra money to a children's charity.

Monica prepares a Thanksgiving feast for the gang, then becomes enraged when everyone shows up late; Phoebe convinces Rachel to enter Emma in a baby beauty contest.

A prospective birth mother (Anna Faris) labors under a misconception about Monica and Chandler's respective occupations.

Rachel and Phoebe spot Chandler getting into a car with a mystery blonde; the friends reminisce about memorable moments.

Joey appears as a celebrity contestant on "$100,000 Pyramid"; Monica and Rachel hire an ungainly stripper (Danny DeVito) for Phoebe's bachelorette party.

A blizzard causes Phoebe and Mike's wedding to spiral out of control; uptight Monica steps in as her friend's wedding planner, then drives everyone crazy.

Monica and Chandler show Erica (Anna Faris) the sights but also learn their baby's biological father might be an unsavory character; Joey begs Phoebe to teach him how to speak French before an audition.

The guys try to figure out who hacked Sheldon's online-game account.

Amy and Sheldon spread gossip as part of an experiment; Howard decides to take a big step in his relationship with Bernadette.

Priya dissects the roommate agreement; the ladies take Sheldon dancing.

Raj tries to cure his social anxiety; Penny spies on Leonard and his girlfriend through Bernadette.

Howard's mom winds up in the hospital after hearing news of her son's engagement to Bernadette.

Bernadette gets her Ph.D., inspiring the guys to tease Wolowitz about his lack of a doctorate; Raj becomes Sheldon's roommate.

Penny worries that she has ruined her relationship with her friends; Sheldon takes over the paintball team.

Amy is caught in the middle when Penny and Sheldon get into an argument over a pre-owned chair; Leonard tries to make his long-distance relationship more exciting.

Amy and Leonard try to become better acquainted; Bernadette, Howard and Mrs. Wolowitz spend the weekend together.

Raj wants a girlfriend, so Penny introduces him to a woman he can communicate with.

Wil Wheaton invites Leonard and Sheldon to a party at his house; Howard receives an opportunity.

Sheldon finds himself competing with the gang for his mother's (Laurie Metcalf) attention when she visits.

An attractive comic book artist tests Leonard and Priya's relationship; Sheldon tries to scare his friends.

Amy is devastated when Penny and Bernadette shop for wedding dresses without her.

The new teams are thirsty; a team of PDA-loving first responders and another team begging Jackie Chan to adopt them are all competing for a chance to win $25,000.

Claire and Phil worry that Alex's boyfriend is imaginary; Manny might ruin Jay's plan to avoid attending a party; Mitch and Cam's new white couch becomes a mishap waiting to happen.

The whole family takes Haley to a bar to celebrate her 21st birthday; Phil and Jay hit a snag while trying to pick up Haley's present; Lily asks Alex, Luke and Manny where babies come from.

When a near-death experience leads to several members of the family deciding to make life changes, the rest of the clan bears the brunt of their new attitudes.

Phil calls in his father and his retired friends to help in a war with the neighbors; Jay and Gloria disagree over Joe's potty training.

When Phil thinks Luke is giving him the cold shoulder, Andy becomes Phil's new right-hand man; Jay is put in a tough spot when it is suspected that Joe is allergic to Stella; Mitchell does some freelance legal work at Jay's company.

Claire senses Phil may be more into "Juliana" than her; Gloria's sister visits; Mitchell and Cameron get into a situation with Anders.

Claire takes a first class seat on a flight, leaving Phil in coach; Gloria makes Jay teach Manny how to defend himself; Mitch, Cam and their friends throw Sal a belated baby shower.

While stuck at the airport, Claire partakes in online snooping that creates drama with the rest of the family.

When their competitor releases a catchy ad, Claire and Jay scramble to shoot a commercial of their own; Phil, Luke and Manny try to take down a drone that a neighbor keeps using to spy on Gloria; Andy is rushed to the hospital.

Claire tackles spring cleaning; Phil has a difficult time when Luke seems to outperform him at many things; Haley tries to distract Alex by taking her to a music festival; Gloria attends Cameron's faculty talent show.

Phil is excited to give Jay a high-tech outdoor grill for his birthday; Claire and Mitchell propose a gift idea they don't expect Jay to accept; Luke and Manny are taught a lesson about drinking; Andy becomes awkward around Haley and her boyfriend.