WHCQ-LD

Switchboard; spoof of U.S. television.

Scout rally; European Song Contest.

Irish singing group; barber.

Singer Tex Cymbal; the seaside.

Nicole (Staci Keanan) hopes her dads (Paul Reiser, Greg Evigan) will be distracted by their attractive new neighbor (Crystal Bernard).

Nicole (Staci Keanan) is disgusted when her friend Shelby (Amy Hathaway) develops a crush on Michael (Paul Reiser). With Greg Evigan.

A quack doctor tells Michael (Paul Reiser) he has a terminal illness; Joey (Greg Evigan) vows revenge when Nicole (Staci Keanan) is cut from a basketball team.

Michael's (Paul Reiser) visiting Uncle Raymond (Jan Murray) makes promises to Nicole (Staci Keanan) he can't keep. Cameo appearance by Willie Mays.

Tootie discloses her friends' I.Q. scores.

Blair decides to put a sex-education lesson to use.

A former Eastland student, now a teenage wife and mother, stops by for a visit.

Blair's decision to donate part of her inheritance to Eastland brings unexpected family news.

The girls must decide if they want to continue living together.

Natalie could be suspended from Eastland when she refuses to reveal her source for a controversial article in the school paper.

A 7-year-old boy refuses to leave his apartment during an evacuation.

Jo learns a lesson in politics when she is elected to the Langley College Board of Regents.

The girls plan to spend a quiet night at the movies before the drive-in closes for good.

When Jo decides to take dancing lessons, she attempts to hide the fact from her friends.

Angry Natalie decides to run for mayor of Peekskill.

Jo takes drastic measures to prevent the deportation of an illegal alien.

Someone called "Desiree" plagiarizes Natalie.

Mona's (Katherine Helmond) first job after graduating from college is an undercover role in a shoe store known for age discrimination.

Mona's (Katherine Helmond) first job after graduating from college is an undercover role in a shoe store known for age discrimination.

Angela and Tony clash over the prearranged marriage of Tony's cousin from Italy.

When Samantha joins the drill team, she neglects her job as Angela's Saturday secretary.

Pupil Tony angers advertising teacher Angela.

Alex grows attached to an unwed, pregnant woman when he attends a natural birth class with Elyse.

While working on a term paper, Alex falls asleep and dreams it's 1776 and he's at Independence Hall in Philadelphia.

Alex surprises Ellen by inviting her father to Parents Day Weekend at Leland College.

Skippy challenges Nick at the Homecoming dance in his obsession with Mallory.

Drew updates the store's training video in hopes of getting a promotion, but Kate pulls a prank and ruins the video.

Drew's old classmate charms him into letting her move in with him, even after she starts causing trouble.

Attorneys step in to settle a dispute when Drew leads an employee revolt over management's refusal to create a skywalk.

Drew (Drew Carey) loses his luggage and money while attending a convention in Las Vegas, but wins a wife. Guest stars: Brett Butler, Jerry Van Dyke, Joely Fisher and Jeremy Piven.

Dave has trouble making his plane when he winds up covering for everybody at the station on Christmas Eve.

Bill brings impressionable Matthew with him when he checks out a prestigious gym he's thinking of joining.

Bill's editorials against rap music lyrics prompt Jimmy to invite rapper Chuck D. to respond on the air.

Dave convinces Matthew to confront Bill about his feelings; Catherine gives Jimmy some gambling tips.

Maya's romance with a puppeteer takes an uncertain turn when she suspects she has inspired a rude new puppet.

Finch meets Mark Hamill (guest starring as himself) at Bartini's and is so annoying that the actor turns the tables.

Nina sets her sights on fashion rival Margo Langhorne (Christine Ebersole) but feels no victory when the battle ends.

Finch tries to ruin the office Christmas with insulting gifts after misunderstanding his present. Narrated by Kelsey Grammer.

Jack and Janet try to thwart a wealthy man's efforts to make Cindy his bride.

Fired Furley moves in with the roommates.

A highly successful but unconventional stockbroker fascinates George.

Billy Dee Williams can't convince Florence that he really is who he says he is.

Fred goes into show business in order to get his brother-in-law out of the house.

Della Reese, a political campaigner, asks Fred for permission to use his home as campaign headquarters, even though Fred and Lamont support a different candidate.

An elderly Indian arrested for disorderly conduct and trespassing expresses his wish to die with dignity in Central Park.

Internal Affairs puts the detectives through a lie-detecting test after newspaper reports of a bribery and kickback racket.

Keith cons Laurie into posing as his date in order to make a girl jealous.

The Partridges are models of home electricity conservation.

A bonus from Mr. Griffin inspires Hazel to buy eyeglasses.

Hazel almost loses her job when she takes on another job as an actress for an advertising campaign.

Jeannie's dog hates uniforms and attacks anybody wearing one.

Jeannie uses magic to help Tony punch; Tony enters the Armed Forces boxing tournament.

Aunt Clara goes on trial because of her failing powers; Samantha saves her from banishment.

Maude panics when she finds out why the ex-convict she hired went to prison.

Maude forces Vivian to attend the funeral of a "dear friend" they both hated.

Vera begs Belle to transform her into a sex goddess after Brian is inattentive so she can attract men. Soon Vera tries out her new look at work.

Mel's financial troubles almost cost his waitresses a salary cut.

Jo's plan to reunite her parents runs into trouble.

Blair devises a way to get Jo to take a money gift.

Henry and Muriel act as referees when a marital dispute erupts between the Kennedys.

Muriel wonders whether she should undergo a face lift after a friend has one and looks much younger.

Rob's wife pays a surprise visit to the Keaton home to confront her husband.

Mallory forgets about Nick when she falls head over heels in love with a glib British graduate student (Jonathan Emerson).

Jack and Janet try to thwart a wealthy man's efforts to make Cindy his bride.

Fired Furley moves in with the roommates.

EPW Wrestling is a pro wrestling show based in Booneville, Miss., that host weekly wrestling events.

Internal Affairs puts the detectives through a lie-detecting test after newspaper reports of a bribery and kickback racket.

An airline strike leaves the Horvaths homeless.

A psychiatrist uncovers long-standing resentments between Ann and her mother.

A highly successful but unconventional stockbroker fascinates George.

Billy Dee Williams can't convince Florence that he really is who he says he is.

Fred goes into show business in order to get his brother-in-law out of the house.

Della Reese, a political campaigner, asks Fred for permission to use his home as campaign headquarters, even though Fred and Lamont support a different candidate.

Actor Charles Grodin, actor Kevin Nealon; actress Linda Thorson.

Becker must sort out his feelings for two different women; Linda's antics leave Margaret at her wits' end.

Jake and Bob want to join Reggie in Europe; Chris isn't convinced when Becker tries to prove his true feelings toward her.

Lowell decides to buy the local wax museum with his inheritance.

Antonio misinterprets plans for an engagement party for Joe and Helen.

When Paul and Jamie confirm their pregnancy, they set out to find the best doctor in the city before telling anyone that they are expecting..

Paul gets a grant to produce the film of his choice, but can't decide on the subject until he visits Ira's Uncle Phil (Mel Brooks); Jamie struggles to give up coffee during her pregnancy.

Julia refurbishes Sugarbakers when the Historical League places it on the tour of historical homes.

To surprise Anthony on his birthday, the Sugarbaker women look for his long-lost father.

The women become lost in the desert when the gang travels to an Arizona dude ranch.

The women become lost in the desert when the gang travels to an Arizona dude ranch.

Jack and Larry switch apartments after Jack has an argument with the girls.

The niece of the cooking-school dean pursues Jack.

George tries to make points with a local banker while Allan tries to make points with the banker's daughter.

George's favorite cousin Dusty pays a visit and brings with him some serious news.

Donna wants to marry Fred, but another man proposes to her first.

Fred tries to transform Esther's appearance to win a beauty contest so that her husband gives him the prize money.

Convinced he's the victim of a government conspiracy, an unemployed spy holds the detectives at gunpoint.

Barney's graceful transition to middle age suffers as his squad expresses concern for his stamina and mental state.

Danny gives Shirley a pin he found, then learns there is a $50 reward.

Shirley dates her high-school sweetheart (George Chakiris).

Hazel comes to the rescue after a young mother is threatened with losing her baby to her mother-in-law.

George identifies a well-liked handyman as a thief.

Jeannie arranges for every wish to be granted in her absence.

Consumed by jealousy, Jeannie changes a top-secret NASA film.

Darrin gets into trouble when Endora gives him a perfect memory.

Maude and her ex-husband Chester find themselves locked in a file closet.

Maude makes a bad situation unbearable when Mrs. Naugatuck's wedding plans hit a snag.

Mel's greed gets him into trouble with a woman and her bodybuilder brother.

Alice dons a rabbit costume and checks up on Tommy, who is spending Easter vacation at Mel's apartment.

A 7-year-old boy refuses to leave his apartment during an evacuation.

Natalie upsets Tootie by dating Tootie's cousin.

Monroe falls for the Rushes' housekeeper, who is an illegal alien.

Henry takes justice into his own hands after Monroe is raped by two women.

Steven must decide whether Nick's sculpture or another artist's work is the winner in a local competition.

At the banking conference in Chicago, Alex refuses to tell his boss (Melinda Culea) what happened the night before.

Jack and Larry switch apartments after Jack has an argument with the girls.

The niece of the cooking-school dean pursues Jack.

Convinced he's the victim of a government conspiracy, an unemployed spy holds the detectives at gunpoint.

Barney's graceful transition to middle age suffers as his squad expresses concern for his stamina and mental state.

Donna wants to marry Fred, but another man proposes to her first.

Fred tries to transform Esther's appearance to win a beauty contest so that her husband gives him the prize money.

Actress Dyan Cannon; anchorman Walter Cronkite, The Mighty Carson Art Players.

Tensions between Becker and Chris escalate, threatening their friendship.

Becker makes a long-distance visit to a former patient (Hal Holbrook) who's on his deathbed; Chris gives Bob a peep show.

Antonio is upset when developer Gavin Rutledge (Jonathan Frakes) romances Casey; Brian has a dream about Helen.

Brian's ninth-grade English teacher (Peggy Lipton) tests him to see if he can make the grade.

Believing things are going too well between her and Paul, Jamie keeps a previously made couples therapy appointment; Paul plans to film his parents as part of his documentary.

Paul and Jamie talk to their unborn child, explaining life, playing music and telling the baby things about themselves featuring flashbacks from past episodes.

Charlene takes a year off from Sugarbakers to devote more time to her baby.

Julia misses dinner with Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter when she is placed on a sequestered jury.

Brenda is tempted to plagiarize an essay to win a role in a rock video.

En route to surprise Lester with a work-site birthday party, Mary and Sandra are accosted by a biker gang.

Jack grows suspicious when Cindy starts collecting maternity clothes.

Roper goes to a bowling banquet instead of celebrating his anniversary.

A turn of fate transforms George and Louise's "routine" into the good old days.

Harry wants to get rid of his lady house-guest.

Despite Lamont's objections, Fred opens a Japanese restaurant in his living room.

Fred goes out for the Senior Olympics to compete for Donna's affection.

Hazel gets George to enter the political limelight when a historical park is threatened.

Hazel and the Baxters get more than they bargained for when they go out on the town.

Jeannie's sister provides Jeannie lessons in the art of catching a husband.

Jeannie causes General Peterson to think Dr. Bellows has gone mad.

An old rivalry upsets Darrin, but Samantha proves that he is a winner after all.

While worrying over a business loan, Walter receives news that may ruin his life.

Maude fears the worst when Walter disappears after losing his store to bankruptcy.

Alice becomes Mel's conscience when he accidentally receives thousands of dollars from an automatic teller.

The staff is trapped in the diner with two guard dogs.

Jo learns a lesson in politics when she is elected to the Langley College Board of Regents.

Natalie's father dies unexpectedly.

Henry and Monroe find a bag of money and plan to keep it, until they discover that a neighbor's home was robbed.

The Rush family recalls how they met Monroe and came to love him in spite of his silly mishaps.

In Chicago, Rebecca gets steamed when Alex refuses to tell her what happened the night before.

Elyse tells Andrew about the Keatons' past male-female battles.

Jack grows suspicious when Cindy starts collecting maternity clothes.

Roper goes to a bowling banquet instead of celebrating his anniversary.

A man threatens to leave his wife to become a soldier of fortune; and Wojo moves in with his new girlfriend, a reformed prostitute.

Wojo's girlfriend, an ex prostitute accepts his invitation to move in; Wojo is afraid of romantic commitment.

Barbara sets out to raise money for a vacation.

Ann learns that women under stress are just as susceptible to heart attacks as men.

A turn of fate transforms George and Louise's "routine" into the good old days.

Harry wants to get rid of his lady house-guest.

Despite Lamont's objections, Fred opens a Japanese restaurant in his living room.

Fred goes out for the Senior Olympics to compete for Donna's affection.

Actor Walter Matthau; actor Ricky Schroder.

Becker tries to woo Chris with an invitation to his place, but she elects to go out with someone else.

Dr. John Becker is easily annoyed -- by noisy neighbors, a ridiculous comment, a flickering streetlight, the antics of his misfit staff members. He's a talented and dedicated doctor and goes the extra mile for those in need, but he doesn't waste a chance to give anyone a piece of his mind.

Helen's mother (Debbie Reynolds) comes to town with a check for Helen and Joe's wedding, unaware that Casey is divorced.

A famous astronaut (Robert Culp) comes to Nantucket to endorse Sandpiper Airlines.

On their way to Paul's childhood home to film a scene for the Buchman documentary, he and Ira lose Paul's father, delaying Paul's chance to hear the baby's heartbeat at Jamie's ultrasound appointment.

Jamie's parents (Carol Burnett, Carroll O'Connor) visit to announce they're taking their dream trip, and Paul nervously prepares for conversation with his father-in-law.

An embarrassed Suzanne wins a date with Anthony at a bachelor charity auction.

Charlene hires Sugarbakers to decorate her new house, which appears to be haunted.

Dylan's cleaning-crazy mother (Charlotte Rae) moves in after leaving his father.

Sandra comes up with a slogan for a new perfume but gets upset when her boss steals her idea.

Jack poses as his own twin to court Ralph's niece.

Larry hatches a plan to save Jack from his girlfriend's jealous other boyfriend.

Louise helps George find the father he never knew.

Louise has a strange reaction to a visit from her long-lost sister.

After lashing out at Lamont, Esther and Bubba, Fred has a dream in which Lamont is the spirit of Christmas past.

Fred is injured and hospitalized while witnessing an attempted murder.

The detectives try to track down a counterfeiter who produces bogus one-dollar bills to supplement his army pension.

A psychiatrist refuses to divulge the name of a known arsonist in his care; and the Twelfth Precinct holds an open house that attracts only vagrants.

Shirley's mother (Rosemary DeCamp) is upset when Shirley's dad (Ray Bolger) joins the band.

Shirley tries to clear up the government's error when Danny gets drafted.

When George's sister tries for a part in a local play, she inadvertently helps his business.

George's ne'er-do-well cousin unjustly earns a label of thief.

A general's hippie daughter uses Jeannie's secret to blackmail Tony.

NASA, suspecting a leak, sends Tony to a secret location to finish design work on a spacecraft, while a lookalike substitutes for Tony at the base and at home -- where he discovers Jeannie.

Endora casts aspersions on Darrin's trustworthiness when his new client is attractive.

An apprehensive Maude visits Walter the day after his suicide attempt.

Carol's latest boyfriend provides Maude with greater worries than the national elections.

Mel announces to the waitresses that he has gambled away the diner.

Mel can get his diner back if he can convince Robert Goulet to perform at a run-down Vegas motel.

Blair can't deal with Jo's increasing popularity.

Blair has to compete for her boyfriend's attention when a movie star enrolls at Langley College.

The Rush family learns that Monroe is dating a wealthy woman who's old enough to be his mother.

Henry discovers that his war-time friend visiting from England is still a womanizer.

Elyse tells Andrew about the Keatons' past male-female battles.

Alex transforms Jennifer's rock band into a '40s-style swing group.

Jack poses as his own twin to court Ralph's niece.

Larry hatches a plan to save Jack from his girlfriend's jealous other boyfriend.

The detectives try to track down a counterfeiter who produces bogus one-dollar bills to supplement his army pension.

A psychiatrist refuses to divulge the name of a known arsonist in his care; and the Twelfth Precinct holds an open house that attracts only vagrants.

Ann must choose between conflicting engagements involving Schneider and her son-in-law.

The gang stages another retirement-hotel show.

Louise helps George find the father he never knew.

Louise has a strange reaction to a visit from her long-lost sister.

After lashing out at Lamont, Esther and Bubba, Fred has a dream in which Lamont is the spirit of Christmas past.

Fred is injured and hospitalized while witnessing an attempted murder.

A late-night talk show hosted by Johnny Carson, including guest interviews and musical performances.

Becker's new patient (French Stewart) drives him batty by scheduling several appointments as multiple personalities; Bob decides he wants to be a father.

Chris loses it after overdoing her good deeds and learning what the purpose of one of her kindnesses really was.

Antonio is held hostage by a crazed air-traffic controller (Dann Florek) on Christmas Eve.

Joe still can't convince Brian and Helen that Sandy Cooper is obsessed with him when she returns to Nantucket.

Paul and Jamie decide Thanksgiving is the perfect time to announce their impending parenthood to family and friends.

Sylvia's sexual desire grows with her regular dosage of estrogen; Paul and Jamie goes on a romantic trip up north with some magical fudge.

Mary Jo harbors a favorite teacher (Meg Wyllie) who has escaped from a nursing home.

Julia becomes obsessed with fitness when Mary Jo gets her to start jogging.

Lester tries to dissuade Calvin from joining the Army.

Julian snubs Mary's invitation to a Christmas party.

Jack and Janet come home to find the apartment in a state of mess; they become detectives when Cindy mysteriously vanishes.

Jack stops lying to women about his roommates; it ends up creating many more problems than it solves.

A new clause in George's will upsets Louise.

George's problems in the bedroom send him on a panicked search for solutions.

Fred uses Lamont's acting school money to supply Whopper Chopper food processors and interrupts a TV cooking show to advertise the device.

Fred stages a circus in the junkyard after he inherits an elephant.

A man whose name was changed after he testified against the mob is falsely arrested for attempted robbery.

A black doctor claims to be cursed by vodoo; Dietrich and Levitt haul in a brokerage firm employee suspected of embezzlement.

Shirley meets an old friend and goes on a date with him; the children are concerned that she is too interested in him; they are even more worried when they see him with another woman.

A smitten neighbor shadows Keith, who has fallen for a 16-year-old store clerk.

Hazel bypasses a scheming politician when the governor comes to the Baxters' for lunch.

Mr. Griffin and his nemesis both enjoy Hazel's sense of humor.

Tony's double turns out to be a spy; the double tells everything to Dr. Bellows.

Tony, who is terrified of horses, accidentally enters a bucking bronco contest.

Darrin is worried that his parents will discover that Tabitha can levitate her toys.

Maude agrees to go on a TV game-show with Vivian.

Arthur panics at the thought of spending a weekend alone with Walter.

Mel ruins Vera's plans to take off for Mexico with her free-spirited aunt.

Tommy is dismissed from school after Mel shows him how to fight.

Blair dreams of the future for herself and her friends.

Sparks fly when Tootie and her mother find it difficult to communicate.

Henry takes drastic measures to avoid paying a high penalty for library books that are five years overdue.

Henry's job is in jeopardy when a picture of him posing with a political candidate and Cosmic Cow appears in the papers.

Mallory and Alex enter and compete in a WKS sponsored scholarship contest.

Alex reflects on his past and attempts to define his own life following the accidental death of a close friend.

Jack and Janet come home to find the apartment in a state of mess; they become detectives when Cindy mysteriously vanishes.

Jack stops lying to women about his roommates; it ends up creating many more problems than it solves.

A man whose name was changed after he testified against the mob is falsely arrested for attempted robbery.

A black doctor claims to be cursed by vodoo; Dietrich and Levitt haul in a brokerage firm employee suspected of embezzlement.

A chance man-on-the-street interview opens the door to the world of fashion modeling for Schneider.

Ann's mother leaves her husband and arrives at the apartment on the same evening that a perfect stranger invites himself to dinner.

A new clause in George's will upsets Louise.

George's problems in the bedroom send him on a panicked search for solutions.

Fred uses Lamont's acting school money to supply Whopper Chopper food processors and interrupts a TV cooking show to advertise the device.

Fred stages a circus in the junkyard after he inherits an elephant.

Actor Sherman Hemsley; sports figure Joe Garagiola; Dalton Stevens.

When Jake recognizes a robber's voice at a hockey game, he persuades Becker to make a citizen's arrest.

Much to Chris' chagrin, Becker announces he'll be spending Christmas with his new girlfriend; Margaret regrets inviting Linda to go caroling.