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Archie Bunker runs a neighborhood bar in Queens.

Archie Bunker runs a neighborhood bar in Queens.

Vivian begins to resent Arthur's constant eulogizing of his late wife in every conversation.

Maude finally meets her match when a black teenager from the ghetto visits the Findlay house.

Danny is interested in the whales singing and tells the family they need to include whales in their act to show their support of ecology; the Partridges make a record featuring the song of a whale to raise awareness of the whale's plight.

Keith decides that being the eldest, he should take more responsibility for his siblings.

Hazel finds that the burglar she tapped on the head with a baseball bat is basically honest.

Hazel concocts a complicated scheme involving antiques and business mergers to get air conditioning in the Baxter home.

Jeannie forces Tony's flight down on a desert island to celebrate the anniversary of Tony's discovery of her bottle; Tony forgets their anniversary.

After Tony tells Jeannie that he wishes every day was a Sunday, Jeannie takes him at his word and makes it happen.

Larry thinks Darrin is seeing another woman; Samantha and Darrin add some spice to their marriage.

Ousted Abner moves in with Darrin and Samantha after a fight with his wife.

Actor Dick Van Patten; George Miller; actor Robert Mitchum; Dennis Madalone.

An old girlfriend shows up at Jack's surprise birthday party.

Jack breaks a date with his girlfriend to keep one with a new romantic interest.

Helen asks the gardener to pose as her "Latin lover" in order to make Stanley jealous.

Vicky tries to restore Jack's injured ego.

Henry's help with Wendall's personal ad backfires.

Fred Scuttle; Roman Emperor Claudius.

Georgian dance; Victorian actor.

Spoofs of Charlie Chaplin and Laurel & Hardy.

Blowpipe; Mervyn Cruddy.

Nicole's (Staci Keanan) classmates dub her a "dweeb." Episode directed by series co-star Florence Stanley. Don Lake guest stars.

Nicole (Staci Keanan) and her dads (Paul Reiser, Greg Evigan) are granted fantasy wishes after winning a "Rock TV" contest. Guest stars: Julius Erving and Bobby Rydell.

Love-struck Joey (Greg Evigan) tries to sway an ex-girlfriend from marrying a rival. Guest stars: Jamie Rose, Lauren Holly.

A former girlfriend's will entrusts two bachelors with custody of her 12-year-old daughter.

The girls must decide if they want to continue living together.

Natalie is devastated when she sees her father with a strange woman.

Tootie decides to go to New York unchaperoned.

Trips home seem to make the Blair-Jo feud worse.

Not wanting more children, Henry discusses having a vasectomy.

A decision by Muriel and Henry to renew their wedding vows almost leads to divorce.

Sparks fly when Henry moves in with Iris to avoid getting the chicken pox from Andrew.

Andrew is taken by a senile grandmother during one of Muriel's photo sessions.

Jessica brings her lover, Detective Donahue, home and is confronted by Chester.

Jessica tells Chester about her involvement with Detective Donahue; Corinne's baby begins to do strange things.

Corinne sets out to bring Tim back from his cave; Burt has an encounter with a UFO.

Corinne's baby begins speaking in Latin and Greek and throws Tim across the room.

An earthquake traps Benson and Clayton, and the governor runs the state from the kitchen.

Benson saves Kraus' life when she chokes on a doughnut, and Kraus drives him crazy with her gratitude.

The governor wants Benson to be the state's new budget director.

Benson poses as a prisoner to investigate conditions at a state prison.

Mary's fantasy about an Old West showdown closely parallels her actual feelings about the opening of a sleazy neighborhood bar.

Rose decides to sell the apartment building to Sandra's boyfriend (Ron Glass).

A school assignment about parenting saddles Brenda and Calvin with a piglet.

Everyone is on edge when a knife-toting man rents a room at 227.

Charlie directs the school play.

Charlie makes unusual casting decisions.

Charlie makes friends with a new gym teacher.

Charlie pulls the plug on Arvid's radio show.

Tony (Tony Danza) is stunned when reunited with a classmate (guest star Joe Regalbuto) he has held a grudge against for years.

Samantha (Alyssa Milano) tries out for the girls basketball team.

Tony is afraid that his Christmas gift for Angela won't compare to her boyfriend's expensive present.

During a bad snowstorm, Tony (Tony Danza) tells the gang how he became Angela's housekeeper. With Judith Light.

Alex tries to hide his problem with insomnia, from the stress of his personal life.

Elyse's plans to match her next-door neighbor with a co-worker backfire.

Guilt-ridden after turning in a young shoplifter to the police, Mallory tries to become her friend.

Steven's new job at the TV station leaves him with very little time to spend with his family.

Drew offends someone special when he toasts Mr. Louder; Mimi hires an attorney in her sexual harassment suit.

When Kate (Christa Miller) is denied a promotion, Drew (Drew Carey) suggests she hold a salon to discuss social issues. Guest stars: Charles Nelson Reilly, Rush Limbaugh.

Drew and Oswald (Drew Carey, Diedrich Bader) test their compatibility with Nicki and Kate (Kate Walsh, Christa Miller) at a Valentine's Day dinner.

Drew hosts Nicki's parents when she goes out of town, but instigates an argument that leads to their breakup.

Lisa (Maura Tierney) learns Jimmy's (Stephen Root) key to management; Bill (Phil Hartman) gets a butler (guest star Ian Abercrombie); Matthew (Andy Dick) is found out on the streets.

Dave and Lisa find out that Bill plans to adopt an infant; Jimmy gets Beth to play a role for a bachelor auction.

Dave gets a surprise visit from his college chums but quickly faces a difficult decision; Lisa gets tough on Matthew.

Hoping to teach Bill (Phil Hartman) a management lesson, Dave and Lisa (Dave Foley, Maura Tierney) promote him, but he rises to the occasion.

A party reveals how different Finch and his wife really are; Maya gives out job evaluations at the office.

Elliott's plan to stir up trouble between his friend (Kevin Sorbo) and Maya backfires when the two decide to set up a date.

Maya's former assistant Cindy returns as a media buyer, and Jack makes Maya take her out for the evening.

Jack tries to convince his ex-wife (Victoria Principal) to marry her new boyfriend, who is putting the moves on Maya.

Jack's girlfriend asks him to father her child.

Jack thinks one of the girls is interested in him.

George has to give the eulogy for one of his employees, a man who was universally detested.

George goes to great lengths to get a hotel's cleaning business.

Fred schemes to get Lamont to marry a distant cousin in the hopes of obtaining her dowry.

Fred's fiancee brings a patient who is under her care to dinner at the Sanford home.

A Peace Corps recruiter goes crazy at a job fair; Dietrich's portable stress analyzer stops working while he's investigating an assault case.

The FBI steps in when micro-processor chips designed for computer games are being exported to Poland.

Keith campaigns for a politician who likes Shirley.

The Partridges are isolated in a mountain cabin during a record-breaking rainstorm.

Harold and Jeff's friendship is endangered after Jeff is put in a special class for advanced students.

Hazel jeopardizes Steve's business when she urges a couple not to sell their home to another realtor.

Jeannie announces she is going to marry Roger to make Tony jealous.

Jeannie makes a double of Tony to show him how to prepare for a wedding.

Darrin's sexy Italian client tries seduce him; Serena turns her into a monkey.

Darrin is frantic when one of his clients is turned into a monkey.

Maude and Walter unwittingly become part owners of a ghetto tenement.

Maude finds herself in a shoddy motel room when she accompanies Walter to an out-of-town convention.

A muscle-bound watchman who saves Jolene's life believes that she's now his girlfriend.

It's not a smooth ride for Mel when he learns that his prized car has been stolen.

Jo's father makes a fortune in the stock market; he goes on a shopping spree and spends money on her rather than giving her the attention she wants.

Tootie has a difficult choice to make when seems more concerned with a theatrical audition than with her upcoming high-school graduation.

Sparks fly when Henry moves in with Iris to avoid getting the chicken pox from Andrew.

A decision by Muriel and Henry to renew their wedding vows almost leads to divorce.

The Keatons are concerned when Jennifer becomes obsessed with environmental issues.

The Keatons recall special moments while helping Andrew fill a "time capsule" with family memorabilia.

Jack's girlfriend asks him to father her child.

Jack thinks one of the girls is interested in him.

The FBI steps in when micro-processor chips designed for computer games are being exported to Poland.

Ann and Francine compete for the same man.

Max is enlisted to coach Alex's baseball team.

George has to give the eulogy for one of his employees, a man who was universally detested.

George goes to great lengths to get a hotel's cleaning business.

Fred schemes to get Lamont to marry a distant cousin in the hopes of obtaining her dowry.

Fred's fiancee brings a patient who is under her care to dinner at the Sanford home.

Sam Donaldson; Fred Greenlee.

Becker and Margaret understand Linda's value after she quits; the presence of a homeless man sparks conversation at the diner.

Reggie starts dating a guy she had a crush on during high school; Becker is upset at a colleague's success.

The breakdown of a new, expensive vacuum takes Joe and Helen to the cleaners; Brian dates Roy's newly arrived niece.

Quarterback Steve Young is among the passengers as Brian takes over the controls of a commercial plane when its pilots unexpectedly become ill.

Nat prepares Murray to vie in a dog show; the Buchmans are stunned when their therapist says their sessions are complete.

Paul infuriates Jamie when he takes one of her dresses to a new dry cleaner; Paul dreams of Einstein.

A shocked Julia discovers a nude portrait of herself when she attends her old art teacher's exhibition.

Mary Jo believes that she has acquired the power to heal when Elvis' face mysteriously appears on her snow shovel.

Pearl meets "Mr. Right" (Charles Lampkin) in a singles bar.

Mary discovers Brenda's friend is selling drugs.

Jack accidentally receives $1,000 from an automatic teller machine.

Jack tries to retrieve his nasty note to a critic.

Florence doubts her executive abilities.

Lionel and Jenny's marriage is in trouble.

When Fred gets a toothache, he insists that Lamont find a white dentist to cure him.

Fred is convinced that Lamont's card-playing buddies are trying to take him for all his money.

When a blizzard paralyzes the city on Christmas Eve, several homeless people take refuge in the squad room.

One of the last two survivors of an old-world tontine tries to commit suicide in order to allow a cousin to inherit.

Greg, a former childhood friend of Laurie's, returns to town and reconnects; it turns out he is now a minister; they go out together and have a great time catching up on their lives; Laurie starts to fall for him; Shirley is worried.

A talent agent sees Keith and offers him a screen test for a Hollywood movie; the agent convinces him that he would be perfect for the part; Keith practices his scene and drives to the studio with the whole family.

Hazel gets involved in the need for a new playground for the neighborhood.

Hazel's will shames George into giving her a raise.

Jeannie must go to Mecca with Tony or lose her powers forever and vanish from his life.

Roger inadvertently summons Jeannie and becomes her new master. Overwhelmed with the power at his disposal, he takes advantage of her magical abilities.

Worrying that her daughter is deprived, Endora ensures that Darrin becomes very generous.

A temporary illness causes Samantha to speak in rhymes; Dr. Bombay's cure doesn't work.

Walter goes into a deep depression over the arrival of his 50th birthday.

Maude takes on the medical profession after she receives treatment from a new doctor.

Mel locks himself in his apartment when everyone -- including his mother -- starts to bother him.

Vera believes she's responsible for the fire that swept through her landlord's apartment.

Natalie and Tootie make some discoveries when they move into an apartment together.

Mrs. Garrett must choose between staying in Peekskill or following her boyfriend to Africa.

Andrew is taken by a senile grandmother during one of Muriel's photo sessions.

Monroe learns an aspiring designer's secret.

Alex goes overboard, filling Andrew's "time capsule" to overflowing, while the rest of the family reminisce.

Nick's temporary residence in the Keaton home ruins Steven's vacation.

Jack accidentally receives $1,000 from an automatic teller machine.

Jack tries to retrieve his nasty note to a critic.

One of the last two survivors of an old-world tontine tries to commit suicide in order to allow a cousin to inherit.

As their wedding date draws near, Mark and Barbara visit Las Vegas.

Barbara and Mark's plans upset Ann.

Florence doubts her executive abilities.

Lionel and Jenny's marriage is in trouble.

When Fred gets a toothache, he insists that Lamont find a white dentist to cure him.

Fred is convinced that Lamont's card-playing buddies are trying to take him for all his money.

Actor Bob Uecker; actress Kathleen Wilhoite; Zippy the Chimp.

Bad weather grounds Becker and Reggie's flight in Buffalo, N.Y., leaving the cantankerous duo with nothing to do but complain.

Becker receives phone calls from a woman he doesn't know, then ends up meeting her only to be shocked by a secret she's been keeping.

Fay's dead husbands appear to her from beyond the grave, demanding the return of their sold possessions; Brian and Casey go on a Valentine's date; a customer hires Sandpapier Air to help him propose to his girlfriend.

A trip to the Big Apple turns sour when Helen and Joe are stranded in New York without money; Joe enters Helen in a drag queen contest.

Paul and Jamie (Paul Reiser, Helen Hunt) decide they need space away from each other; Ira (John Pankow) becomes Marvin's (guest star Jeff Garlin) wrestling manager. Randy "Macho Man" Savage guest stars as himself.

Paul and Jamie get arrested after stealing Burt's broken-down car; guests Cyndi Lauper, Richard Belzer.

Anthony tries to rise above his jealousy when Etienne's (Sheryl Lee Ralph) successful male college friend (Ron Glass) visits.

Julia's overbearing former schoolmistress moves in with her after receiving instructions at a seance.

Mary's new job at the travel agency takes her out of town with her boss.

Pearl is refused her Social Security check because records show that she's dead.

Jack winds up with two dates for the same day.

Jack tries to keep his girlfriend's job a secret.

George gets Lionel to see a marriage counselor.

George thinks the heroic man in a newspaper story may be Louise's supposedly dead father.

A burglar leaves his gun in the Sanford house after Lamont and Rollo scare him off.

Fred is beside himself when his new Puerto Rican neighbor opens a competing junkyard.

The plainclothes detectives step in while the rest of the force takes an examination.

A mugger singles out street clowns; and a bureaucrat alleviates jail overcrowding by quietly releasing a hundred inmates on Madison Avenue in the dead of night.

Danny wins an insomniac racehorse.

The Partridges decide to move to a larger house.

George comes down with a cold on the same day he is to meet with an important client.

George defends Hazel, charged with a traffic violation.

Roger gets in a jam and needs Jeannie's help to get him out of it.

Jeannie wants to accompany Tony to Rome; Tony tells Jeannie to get a passport without magic.

Endora causes trouble when she zaps two living busts of Larry and Darrin in the Stephens home.

Phyllis makes a catty remark about Samantha's family; Serena turns Darrin's mother into a cat.

When a fire damages his house, Arthur moves in temporarily with Maude and Walter.

Florida's husband demands that she stop working for white people and quit her job with the Findlays.

Mel sells the diner to the girls when he decides to accept an irresistible job offer.

Tommy's about to hang up his basketball uniform and forfeit his college scholarship. Guest star: Meadowlark Lemon.

When Mrs. Garrett decides to marry and move to Africa, her sister moves in with the girls.

The girls fear that Tootie and her boyfriend are becoming too serious.

Iris' failure to show up for Thanksgiving dinner preparations has the family worried.

Henry's blood pressure soars when he is trapped in an elevator with Monroe while on the way to an insurance physical.

Emotions run high in the Keaton household as Alex prepares to leave for a prime job with a New York stock brokerage firm.

Elyse feels a sense of loss as Alex prepares to move to New York.

Jack winds up with two dates for the same day.

Jack tries to keep his girlfriend's job a secret.

A mugger singles out street clowns; and a bureaucrat alleviates jail overcrowding by quietly releasing a hundred inmates on Madison Avenue in the dead of night.

Schneider refuses to acknowledge his hearing loss.

Ann's mother makes some accurate predictions into the future when she starts reading tarot cards.

George gets Lionel to see a marriage counselor.

George thinks the heroic man in a newspaper story may be Louise's supposedly dead father.

A burglar leaves his gun in the Sanford house after Lamont and Rollo scare him off.

Fred is beside himself when his new Puerto Rican neighbor opens a competing junkyard.

Actor Bob Hope; actor Clint Eastwood; host and comedian David Letterman.

Becker won't listen to his doctor after he is accidentally shot during an argument between two motorists.

Becker is forced to stay at home and deal with his neighbors during his recuperation period; Margaret and Linda try to find a fill-in doctor.

Joe and Helen find marital bliss after they insist that Brian move out; Antonio and his girlfriend split.

Brian receives someone else's love letters in his mail and reads them, believing he has found the perfect woman.

Paul and his mother-in-law, Theresa, are involved in a car accident; Theresa's estranged husband visits.

Paul and Jamie learn they may be distant cousins; Sylvia has a sudden change of heart about her daughter-in-law.

Carlene decides to dress like a man when she discovers her new boyfriend (Greg Kean) is a cross-dresser.

In a parody of "Gone With the Wind," Sugarbakers redecorate a mansion, according to a woman's bad taste.

Mary and Sandra dress in drag to get into Lester's men's club.

Mary's fantasy about an Old West showdown closely parallels her actual feelings about the opening of a sleazy neighborhood bar.

Jack disguises himself as a woman to compete in a baking contest.

Jack's meddling father drops in unexpectedly.

George and Louise think they've both found the perfect new maid.

When George is convinced that he's no longer attractive, Louise attempts to rekindle the flames of romance in his heart.

Fred is forced to find a new partner for the junkyard when Lamont seeks employment elsewhere.

Lamont discovers that his new fiancee may actually be his half sister.

Lieutenant Scanlon falls for a wealthy mugging victim; a restaurateur breaks into his own restaurant; The squad investigates Chinatown gang wars.

Harassment charges are pressed against Lieutenant Scanlon; Harris and Dietrich interrogate a key witness to a gang murder.

After accepting a date with an ardent old admirer, Shirley later has to figure out how to get rid of him and his mother.

The Partridges and Reuben are held hostage by an escaped convict (Arte Johnson).

An unethical interior decorator threatens Dorothy's business.

A lost dog inspires George to buy an alarm system.

Jeannie helps Tony live out his childhood dream of becoming a surgeon.

Tony becomes frustrated over Jeannie's constant use of magic to help around the house.

Envious Serena decides she wants to be like Samantha and wed a mortal.

A chimp follows Samantha home and is launched on an advertising career.

Walter is caught having a cocktail with his former secretary.

Maude tries to bring a school chum and her estranged daughter together to patch up their differences.

Vera has a few confessions to make when Mel decides to have the waitresses bonded.

Mel asks his cousin for help in a crazy scheme to crush a competitor.

Jo finds it difficult to pay her share of transforming the attic into a loft.

Tootie undermines the competition when she auditions for her first Broadway show. Guest: pop singer Stacey Q.

The family tries to put together a makeshift Christmas after Andrew becomes sick and plans for a holiday ski trip are cancelled.

A visit from Muriel's former singing partner causes her to wonder what it would have been like if she had pursued a career.

Peer pressure causes Jennifer to give up a male pal, but her mom helps them reunite.

A college coed seduces teenage Alex when he meets her delivering groceries.

Jack disguises himself as a woman to compete in a baking contest.

Jack's meddling father drops in unexpectedly.

Host Mike Detillier and former Saints QB John Fourcade discuss upcoming Saints action and break down LSU on the Gridiron.

Harassment charges are pressed against Lieutenant Scanlon; Harris and Dietrich interrogate a key witness to a gang murder.

Everything is going smoothly before Barbara and Mark's wedding until Barbara has second thoughts and Julie gets labor pains.

Mark finds himself on the golf course moments before his wedding.

George and Louise think they've both found the perfect new maid.

When George is convinced that he's no longer attractive, Louise attempts to rekindle the flames of romance in his heart.

Fred is forced to find a new partner for the junkyard when Lamont seeks employment elsewhere.

Lamont discovers that his new fiancee may actually be his half sister.

Actor/comedian Richard Pryor; actress Rain Pryor.

Becker believes Elizabeth might be a dishonest doctor when she lies about having aspirin to stop his pain.

Jake realizes that he can't forgive the man (Cress Williams) whose drunken driving cost him his eyesight.