KQSY-LD

Gomer ruins a trained guard dog by turning him into a gentle pet.

Carter bets a month's pay that any knucklehead can handle a supply sergeant's job.

Banker Drysdale hires the world's greatest violin virtuoso to teach Jethro to play the fiddle.

Granny thinks a soap opera is real and sets out to rescue an actor whose character is about to undergo a serious operation.

Granny becomes enraged when Elly's pack of dogs tramples her every time she announces a meal is ready.

Granny convinces herself that she has the gift of prophecy and starts making predictions.

Desperate for money, Dan moonlights as a male escort. His second job becomes problematic when the woman he's escorting demands that he sleep with her. Meanwhile, Yakov returns to the courtroom to announce his wife is arriving in America.

A substitute judge arrests the staff when Harry takes a night off.

Harry becomes a foster father to the courthouse shoeshine boy.

Mac's in-laws arrive from Vietnam and move in with him and Quon Le, while Harry plans a surprise birthday party in Dan's honor.

Rebecca coaches Norm for a job interview as a taster at a brewery; a slot machine is accidentally delivered to the bar.

Sam defends his ladies man status in a contest with a suave Frenchman (Anthony Cistaro).

Cliff's old girlfriend blows back into town after a six-month absence; Rebecca hires a jingle writer.

Carla feels responsible when John Allen Hill suffers a heart attack after she admits her feelings for him.

Bob develops a unique psychological problem when Carol decides to resume her college career and become a psychologist.

The Hartleys are bombarded with legal hassles when Bob is sued by a shy patient and Emily decides to fight a parking ticket.

When the Hartleys entertain Howard's son, they hire a beauty queen (Brooke Adams) as a baby sitter.

Cliff Murdock (Tom Poston), Bob's old laugh-a-minute college buddy, affectionately known as "The Peeper," pays a return visit. An uncharacteristically somber Cliff announces that his wife has left him.

Agent Maxwell Smart starts an investigation into a series of abductions.

The Chief suspects an informer is in the midst of the prisoners.

Sledge (David Rasche) attempts to keep the KGB away from a Soviet citizen. Mark Blankfield and Lee Garlington guest star.

Trunk and Doreau (Harrison Page, Anne-Marie Martin) offer damaging testimony against Hammer (David Rasche), who's on trial for the murder of a notorious hood.

A witty housewife competes to win fabulous prizes.

A cartoonist competes to win fabulous prizes.

Ricky and David get their independence with separate bedrooms.

Thorny agrees to buy Harriet's Valentine's Day gift.

Mary does her best to get her best friend a date.

Donna recalls her courtship, then plays matchmaker.

The Stones' friends think Donna and Alex are splitting.

A young family friend falls for Mary.

When Donald asks Ann to house sit for him, she is shocked to discover his frat brother Harry Banner is also staying there.

Ann and Don take a week's vacation before Ann is to go on the road with a show.

While in Philadelphia for a pre-Broadway play, Ann finds that she misses Don.

Donald writes an article on a newfangled psychological exam, and he tries to use it on Ann and the Baumans.

Ida's desire to become a grandmother results in her arranging yet another date for Brenda.

Rhoda's business is booming, partially because of Myrna Morgenstern's "persuasive" sales pitch.

Against his better judgment, Joe hires Brenda's obnoxious boyfriend, Nick, to be a wrecker.

Ida considers Rhoda's new vivacious, middle-aged neighbors to be a threat to her relationship with her daughter.

Mary becomes involved with a comedy writer who really wants to be a comic.

Ted's decision to earn extra money as an actor in television commercials has Lou in an uproar.

Mary is the "other woman" after friends split.

Mary's parents are having a difficult time adjusting to life in the city.

Laverne makes an unforgettable first impression at her new job when she tries on an anti-gravity suit.

Laverne decides to become a Playboy Bunny and meets Hugh Hefner.

When Laverne is convinced that she is jinxed, her friends send a Gypsy to help her.

Laverne's plan to restore her boyfriend's self-confidence backfires.

Iola and Mama run for the presidency of the ladies' church group.

Mama sets out to discourage Naomi and Vint from having a baby.

Naomi's boss wants to trade favors for a promotion.

Bubba videotapes his family for a class project.

Connie tries to start a fight with Philip.

Mother/daughter cons work a Christmas cruise; depression overcomes a comic portraying Santa; a couple are reunited after 11 years.

A burglary strands a boss (Tony Randall) at his secretary's (Julie Newmar) apartment.

While waiting for their honeymoon suite, Steve and April visit an antique shop. "Love And The Phonies" Boyd and Daphne return from a formal party.

George decides to drop in to his favorite restaurant; a real square picks up a cool hitchhiker.

A TV star (Adam West) visits a stamp collector.

A Russian farm expert visits Mayberry.

To prove a point, Howard robs the Mayberry bank.

When Mike flunks an arithmetic test, it threatens a vacation to California.

Palm Springs lifestyles impress the gang.

Joey thinks he has found his dream girl, comic Roxy Mardin (Felicia Michaels), but she turns out to be a nightmare.

Michelle is charmed by Jesse's grandfather who arrives from Greece for a visit.

Jesse returns from Greece with his charming cousin (John Stamos in a dual role), who turns out to be a dashing con man.

Steve goes to Hollywood on a class trip, leaving a dejected D.J. to go on a difficult mountain climb.

Greg and Marcia are left in charge of the rest of the clan when Mike and Carol go out for the evening.

A rich, titled English widow (Ida Lupino) proposes to French.

Dinah Shore and Danny are professional rivals.

Donna listens to other women's praise of her husband.

A glamorous secretary innocently enters the lives of Steve and Robbie and causes double domestic crises.

Little Dodie goes to the hospital for a tonsillectomy and insists that Steve stay the night with her.

In danger after witnessing a robbery, Lucy is rescued by Mannix.

Lucy turns into a talent scout when she tries to give Mel Torme his big break.

Lucy and Ricky reconsider their decision of moving into their new Connecticut home.

The Ricardos get settled in their country home and decide to visit the Mertzes.

Rob, Laura, Sally and Buddy spend a frightening night in a haunted cabin at a mountain resort.

When Bess Lindstrom's boyfriend meets Mary, he falls madly in love with her.

Fonzie digs into his little black book to come up with an instant date for Al.

Laverne is convinced that the former trapeze artist she's been dating is out to kill her.

A woman falls for a band's chaperon; a woman job-seeker poses as a man; a couple reconsiders; a boy proposes to Vicki.

A stiff British ex-military officer is put in charge of the fun-loving and energy-filled Menudo group; a young couple is confounded because Doc seems to be in love with his visiting ex-wife, a fact Doc attributes to the fact that he is divorced.

Granny plans the first head transplant in history when Mr. Drysdale is hurt in a fracas with his wife.

Cousin Roy arrives from the hills as advance man for Granny's hated rival, Myrtle Halsey.

Mama mistakenly believes that Vint bought her an expensive bracelet.

Greed overtakes Mama when she gets $800 from a malfunctioning bank teller machine.

Fred goes into show business in order to get his brother-in-law out of the house.

Della Reese, a political campaigner, asks Fred for permission to use his home as campaign headquarters, even though Fred and Lamont support a different candidate.

Mike and Gloria happily prepare for Mike's new job and their move to California.

Edith and Archie plan a farewell dinner for Mike and Gloria but learn that the couple has made other plans.

Joy tests her sleuthing skills on a suspicious Yogi; Victoria learns about being a responsible friend; Mamie confronts Elka about her bossiness; Melanie has hallucinations due to fasting.

Victoria wonders about her relationship with Emmet as the movie is ending; Melanie questions her relationship with Alec; Joy learns something mysterious about Elka.

Rob and Laura become rivals when each writes a story for children.

Rob goes out to cool off after a quarrel with Laura and winds up in trouble.

Lilith confesses to Frasier that she has had an extramarital affair; Sam hires a bouncer for the bar.

Frasier stands on a ledge to try and win Lilith back after she admits to an affair.

Louie hits an old woman while trying to teach the art of cab driving to a new driver.

Felix's daughter runs away from home so she can follow her recording idol, Paul Williams.

Bob receives a telegram saying that his old college chum, "The Peeper", is coming to Chicago and bringing a surprise. The surprise turns out to be a brand-new bride.

Smart must go to Washington to get secret plans when his contact is killed.

Alice and Trixie rebel when Ralph and Ed make it clear that they are the bosses.

An insubordinate GI thwarts Bilko's drive for glory.

Featuring clown Emmett Kelly; a musical performance from The Jackson 5; Carol in a dual role for the movie spoof, A Swiped Life.

Maynard and Dobie help at a home for boys.

After overhearing part of a conversation, Conklin thinks Miss Brooks is about to replace him as principal.

A US government top secret camera falls out a plane right into Hooterville hotel. The device has a dangerous hidden detonator.

Ann and Don feel a terrific amount of personal pressure when she becomes his secretary.

Michelle sets out to prove everyone wrong when she enters the Downhill Derby race.

Michelle finds herself in trouble when she is forced to choose between friends.

Danny and D.J.'s blind dates end up flirting with each other; Jesse plans for Mother's Day.

Joey runs for PTA president after the school cancels Michelle's favorite class.

Marcia's slumber party plans may be laid to rest when the school principal (E.G. Marshall) calls her parents.

Buffy's hamster runs away in the park.

Danny meets with successful school friends -- and then dreams of becoming a surgeon, a scientist and a diplomat.

Jeff feels responsible for a neighbor's accident.

Steve's (Fred MacMurray) old girlfriend, now a rich divorcee, comes to town and gives Barbara (Beverly Garland) a few jealous moments.

Robbie pays a disappointing visit to his old hometown and learns the truth of the adage "You can't go home again.".

Lucy is quarantined with newly returned astronauts.

Lucy and her new girlfriend, Joan, set out to impress their handsome neighbor.

A furniture deal causes problems with the neighbors.

Lucy and Ricky decide to raise chickens to make some extra money; when Fred Mertz answers their ad for a chicken farmer, the Mertzs and Ricardos think they have found the perfect way to be neighbors again. Some 500 baby chicks in the house disagree!

Rob and Laura are unaware that their teenage baby sitter has a crush on Laura.

Lou leaves Mary in charge of the newsroom when he checks into the hospital for minor surgery.

Richie and Lori Beth end up going different ways for a weekend at the Blue Ox Inn.

Laverne visits a convent to contemplate her sins and discovers all the nuns have taken a vow of silence.

The Mermaids' choreographer charms Isaac; Gopher plays mediator; Doc looks after Gopher's girlfriend; Judy falls for a mysterious man.

The Temptations board with their manager; a loan shark (Vic Tayback) bargains for a date; the captain becomes involved in a kidnapping.

Jed decides to withdraw his $80 million from the bank and give it to England.

The Clampetts invade England again to visit their castle and return Canada to the Queen.

Mama has visions of her overbearing mother.

Mama disrupts Vint's plans to join an elite poker club.

Donna wants to marry Fred, but another man proposes to her first.

Fred tries to transform Esther's appearance to win a beauty contest so that her husband gives him the prize money.

Saying goodbye to Mike and Gloria before they leave for California proves traumatic for the Bunkers.

Edith's cousin Floyd drops in with hopes of leaving his daughter with the Bunkers.

Elka and Mamie's illegal business activities endanger the group; a local mobster and his mother offer help.

Victoria is tricked into coming home for a visit, only to find her mother in an alarming state; Joy and Melanie revisit the '70s; Elka offers Penny advice.

Rob recalls the time he was out of work and Laura was expecting Ritchie.

Rob accuses his friend of taking his missing watch.

Rebecca's father (Robert Prosky) visits, with some stern advice for his unmarried daughter; Woody wants Kelly to move in with him.

Frasier goes out on his first date since his marriage ended; Cliff begins a business venture with his new video camera.

Louie sneaks Bobby's hateful letter to a critic to the newspaper.

Oscar takes a job with a radio station as a sports talk show host.

The Hartleys miss a Fourth of July Bicentennial party when they are trapped in a storage locker.

Max intercepts part of a formula for a deadly explosive KAOS is creating.

Ralph's brother-in-law (Pat Harrington) asks him for money to buy a hotel.

A society girl refuses to be the queen of the Motor Pool Mardi Gras.

The Family steps out as Mama, Eunice, and Ed go to a fancy restaurant; Tim's Oldest Man is a Wild West sheriff.

Dobie learns about his brilliant namesake.

Madison High protects its star athlete from Mr. Conklin's wrath.

Uncle Joe and the girls are forced to find employment when Homer arranges for the bank to foreclose Kate's mortgage.

Mystery surrounds a baseball Ann bought at an auction.

Jesse and Joey realize the time has come for them to find their own homes when a tycoon (Keene Curtis) makes a lucrative offer for Danny's house.

Comet the dog runs away, prompting Michelle to search the streets of San Francisco.

Nicky and Alex begin preschool, much to Jesse's consternation.

Stephanie is confused at her first real party; Jesse's band replaces him with former "Brady Bunch" cast member Barry Williams.

Marcia becomes infatuated with a boy who seems to be more interested in insects than girls.

Cissy plans to stay out all night after graduating from high school.

Kathy decides to pursue a career in fashion.

Mary keeps the secret of a friend planning to elope.

Barbara loses the feeling that she is a guest in her own home when Steve leaves town and she confronts one of Chip's teachers.

A special project at the plant keeps Steve and Robbie so busy nights that their wives decide to visit them.

Lucy and Kim plan a bogus counterfeiting operation to pressure Harry into giving Lucy a raise.

Lucy takes a stuntman's place in a movie dressed as a cowboy.

The Ricardos and Mertzes go to war over chicken-raising and PTA meetings.

Lucy puts together her own band for a fund-raiser.

Rob's friendship with Jerry is almost destroyed in a row over a neighbor's crab grass lawn.

Upon meeting an old boyfriend and his fiancee, Mary sets off an unexpected chain of events.

Howard joins Fonzie as a holdout against their fellow jurors in a purse-snatching case.

Laverne joins a dance troupe to rescue Squiggy, who is being held captive by KGB men.

A woman (Marion Ross) dodges Andy Warhol; a couple (Andy Griffith, Cloris Leachman) searches for a rare stamp; pay rates upset Ace.

Gopher envisions the liner as a World War II troop ship en route to France; guests Charo, Nathan Cook, Stephanie Mills, Erin Moran.

Drysdale orders Jane to pose as Queen Elizabeth I, who the hillbillies think is still England's ruler.

Jethro falls for a beautiful Scot, but his hillbilly kin confuse her for her hulking brother in kilts and think Jethro is crazy.

Mama suspects Bubba of more than studying with a pretty classmate.

Mama's home may be demolished to make way for a new landfill.

Despite Lamont's objections, Fred opens a Japanese restaurant in his living room.

Fred goes out for the Senior Olympics to compete for Donna's affection.

Archie and Harry apply for partnership life insurance, and Archie fears his life may be over when an X-Ray reveals a possible spot on his liver. He decides not to tell Edith, but doesn't realize that Barney already has.

When Barney Hefner's wife wants to make up, Archie's got a better idea.

Since they both have been married several times before, Emmet searches for a way to propose.

Victoria acts as a spokesmodel and commits to a donation on national television; Joy reunites with a fireman.

Rob can't make up his mind when asked to be a candidate for the city council.

Rob agrees to run for office but realizes he'd prefer to vote for his opponent.

Norm's plan to avoid an IRS audit backfires; Sam tries to prevent the bar from watching an old Red Sox game.

The gang rips the bar apart when Robin returns stating that he used to hide million-dollar money belts.

The cabbies pound the pavement looking for new jobs when the Sunshine Cab Co. goes out of business.

Oscar starts dating an old flame and decides he would like to marry her.

Bob's therapy group gets a surprise when a patient (Howard Hesseman) announces that he is gay.

Max romances a KAOS agent, all in the line of duty, of course.

Ralph and Alice appear on "Beat the Clock.".

Bilko bets on a soldier who is participating in an eating contest.

Guest star Joanne Woodward spends an evening with The Family in this episode; Joanne plays a past schoolmate of Eunice's whose return to town for a visit upsets Mama and Ed's expectations of Eunice.

Maynard decides to tell only the truth.

Connie plans a birthday party for her landlady.

Betty Jo's pal, Willie, has a knack for the roulette wheel. Uncle Joe plans to use his ability to save the whole valley from foreclosure by Homer Bedloe.

Police raid a club where waitress Ann is serving mobsters.

Michelle accidentally reveals her secret club; Kimmy dates D.J.'s ex-boyfriend.

Substitute teacher Joey disciplines Michelle in front of the class.

Michelle's new pet burro makes life miserable until Jesse discovers that music soothes the savage beast.

Jesse puts a new band together and books a series of out-of-town gigs; D.J. falls for the new guitarist.

Greg is in hot water after he collects money for rides from his brothers and sisters.

The siblings' long-absent grandfather pays a visit.

Danny discovers Rusty is a gang member.

Jeff hides a runaway friend in the basement.

Ernie (Barry Livingston) becomes the unwilling object of the affection of Dodie's (Dawn Lyn) 6-year-old friend Beatrice.

A bearded man of mystery confounds the Douglas family and authorities alike. With Fred MacMurray, Don Grady and Tim Considine.

Lucy shares a seat on a ski lift with Dinah Shore.

Lucy and the Countess get involved with a pregnant racehorse.

After six weeks in their country home, Lucy looks forward to a night in New York.

A misunderstanding between the Ricardos and Mertzes leads to intense jealousy.

Rob is offered a job as humor consultant on a magazine for men-about-town.

Lou achieves his lifelong ambition to be the owner of a bar.

An accident at Al's causes Fonzie to lose his sight and his spirit.

Laverne pretends to be pregnant in order to win prizes in a contest for mothers-to-be.

Swindlers target Doc; newlyweds battle; a foe threatens reunited lovers; two women search for wealthy husbands.

Swindlers target Doc; newlyweds battle; a foe threatens reunited lovers; two women search for wealthy husbands.

Granny plans a trip to Hooterville, but gets sidetracked when she thinks that Jed is planning to marry Hathaway.

Jethro hires a gorgeous Italian girl who cooks masterfully but doesn't know a word of English.

An answering machine and a stray dog give Mama the wrong idea.

Vint and Naomi compete against Mama and her friend in a dance contest.

Fred is injured and hospitalized while witnessing an attempted murder.

Fred uses Lamont's acting school money to supply Whopper Chopper food processors and interrupts a TV cooking show to advertise the device.

Archie insists that a new home be found for Stephanie, but Edith has other ideas.

After an elderly aunt dies alone and unloved, Edith is the only one who comes to pay final respects.

The women try to make Wilbur's first birthday memorable; Melanie and Alec consider having a family together.

Melanie rebounds with Danny; Victoria hires a lawyer to help Emmet; Joy and Elka attend film class.

Mel takes Rob's advice to stand up to Alan Brady -- and is promptly fired.

Rob and Laura remember the time they completed an application for a $10 divorce.

Carla's daughter announces she is pregnant and is going to marry the father; Carla's ex-husband and his wife show up at the wedding.

Rebecca convinces the others to throw a party for Frasier, who is despondent over his impending divorce.

The cabbies meet one month after the closing of the Sunshine Cab Co. to discuss what great careers they have found.

Oscar finds a friend with inside information at the racetrack and starts to win every bet he makes.