TV Land (East) (TVLAND)

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Ray Romano hit the sitcom stratosphere with this gem based on his stand-up routine. It's about a Long Island sportswriter and his intrusive parents, who live (in)conveniently across the street from him, his wife and their three children. Romano and costars Patricia Heaton, Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle and Brad Garrett were virtual Emmy-nomination machines and scored eight wins among them. Boyle alon

Life's good for deliveryman Doug Heffernan, until his newly widowed father-in-law, Arthur, moves in with him and his wife Carrie. Doug is no longer the king of his domain, and instead of having a big screen television in his recently renovated basement, he now has a crazy old man. (Repeat).

Life's good for deliveryman Doug Heffernan, until his newly widowed father-in-law, Arthur, moves in with him and his wife Carrie. Doug is no longer the king of his domain, and instead of having a big screen television in his recently renovated basement, he now has a crazy old man. (Repeat).

Life's good for deliveryman Doug Heffernan, until his newly widowed father-in-law, Arthur, moves in with him and his wife Carrie. Doug is no longer the king of his domain, and instead of having a big screen television in his recently renovated basement, he now has a crazy old man. (Repeat).

Life's good for deliveryman Doug Heffernan, until his newly widowed father-in-law, Arthur, moves in with him and his wife Carrie. Doug is no longer the king of his domain, and instead of having a big screen television in his recently renovated basement, he now has a crazy old man. (Repeat).

Life's good for deliveryman Doug Heffernan, until his newly widowed father-in-law, Arthur, moves in with him and his wife Carrie. Doug is no longer the king of his domain, and instead of having a big screen television in his recently renovated basement, he now has a crazy old man. (Repeat).

A gym member (Anthony Starke) teams with George in business and makes a date with Elaine to see Mel Torme; Jerry suspects his dentist (Bryan Cranston) of hanky-panky. Cheryl: Alison Armitage. Deensfrei: Robert Katims. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).

Jerry's family lives it up at the Plaza for free, thanks to Elaine; the fumigation of Jerry's apartment disables Kramer's taste buds. Shelly: Dana Wheeler-Nicholson. Paula: Christa Miller. Helen: Liz Sheridan. Morty: Barney Martin. (Repeat).

Jerry's mechanic "steals" his lovemaking technique; someone's license plates enhance Kramer's image; Mrs. Costanza gets an eye job. Mrs. Costanza: Estelle Harris. Danny: Patrick Warburton. Nancy: Marla Sucharetza. (Repeat).

A booking agent (Debra Jo Rupp) is overly attentive to Jerry; Pitt puts Elaine in his will; Kramer starts gambling again. Morgan: Tom Wright. Karl: Ellis E. Williams. Lenore: Kim Zimmer. Pitt: Ian Abercrombie. Kramer: Michael Richards. (Repeat).

An irreverent and outrageous take on true family love and dysfunction. Newly sober single mom Christy struggles to raise two children in a world full of temptations and pitfalls. Testing her sobriety is her formerly estranged mother, now back in Christy's life and eager to share passive-aggressive insights into her daughter's many mistakes. (Repeat).

An irreverent and outrageous take on true family love and dysfunction. Newly sober single mom Christy struggles to raise two children in a world full of temptations and pitfalls. Testing her sobriety is her formerly estranged mother, now back in Christy's life and eager to share passive-aggressive insights into her daughter's many mistakes. (Repeat).

An irreverent and outrageous take on true family love and dysfunction. Newly sober single mom Christy struggles to raise two children in a world full of temptations and pitfalls. Testing her sobriety is her formerly estranged mother, now back in Christy's life and eager to share passive-aggressive insights into her daughter's many mistakes. (Repeat).

An irreverent and outrageous take on true family love and dysfunction. Newly sober single mom Christy struggles to raise two children in a world full of temptations and pitfalls. Testing her sobriety is her formerly estranged mother, now back in Christy's life and eager to share passive-aggressive insights into her daughter's many mistakes. (Repeat).

Paid Programming. (Repeat).

Paid Programming. (Repeat).

Aunt Bee is hired for a series of commercials for Foster Furniture Polish, but she freezes in front of the camera. Ronnie Schell guest stars as a director. At the time, Schell was also a regular on "Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C." as Duke. Foster: Robert Emhardt. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

When Goober gets girlfriend Flora (Alberta Nelson) to fill in for him at the filling station while he goes fishing, business booms because of her feminine ways. Wally: Cliff Norton. Edna: Maudie Prickett. Goober: George Lindsey. (Repeat).

Opie uncovers the true and not-so-spectacular story behind the historic Battle of Mayberry when he writes an essay on the subject. Tom: Norm Alden. Farley: Clinton Sundberg. Purvis: Arthur Malet. Opie: Ronny Howard. (Repeat).

A pop singer (Jesse Pearson) stops in Mayberry for a fishing trip and Aunt Bee and Clara pitch him a song they've written, which he then performs on his TV show---but not exactly the way the ladies had written it. This episode wrapped up the show's sixth season. Stone: Tom D'Andrea. Clerk: Byron Foulger. Ferdie: Joel Redlin. Clara: Hope Summers. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

A beloved, multi-Emmy-winning series about Army surgeons cutting up amid the Korean War. 'War is hell. So is TV,' said Larry Gelbart, who developed the series for TV from the 1970 Robert Altman film. ' 'M*A*S*H' and the medium,' Gelbart added, 'were made for each other.' For 11 years (10 in the Top 20), the show deftly blended sharp, thoughtful humor with moving scenes of dedicated, stressed docto

A beloved, multi-Emmy-winning series about Army surgeons cutting up amid the Korean War. 'War is hell. So is TV,' said Larry Gelbart, who developed the series for TV from the 1970 Robert Altman film. ' 'M*A*S*H' and the medium,' Gelbart added, 'were made for each other.' For 11 years (10 in the Top 20), the show deftly blended sharp, thoughtful humor with moving scenes of dedicated, stressed docto

A beloved, multi-Emmy-winning series about Army surgeons cutting up amid the Korean War. 'War is hell. So is TV,' said Larry Gelbart, who developed the series for TV from the 1970 Robert Altman film. ' 'M*A*S*H' and the medium,' Gelbart added, 'were made for each other.' For 11 years (10 in the Top 20), the show deftly blended sharp, thoughtful humor with moving scenes of dedicated, stressed docto

Ben Cartwright and his three sons (by three wives) ride herd over the sprawling Ponderosa spread in 1860s Nevada in one of the most handsomely mounted and beloved series of all time. The first TV Western to be shown in color, it ran for 14 seasons; was the top-rated show for three of them (1964-65, '65-66 and '66-67); had a number of first-rank directors (including Robert Altman) work on some epis

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

Gunsmoke is an American radio and television Western drama series created by director Norman MacDonnell and writer John Meston. The stories take place in and around Dodge City, Kansas, during the settlement of the American West. The central character is lawman Marshal Matt Dillon, played by William Conrad on radio and James Arness on television. (Repeat).

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

The Andy Griffith Show is an American sitcom first televised on CBS between October 3, 1960 and April 1, 1968. Andy Griffith portrays the widowed sheriff of the fictional small community of Mayberry, North Carolina. His life is complicated by an inept, but well-meaning deputy, Barney Fife, a spinster aunt and housekeeper, Aunt Bee, and a precocious young son, Opie. Local ne'er-do-wells, bumbling p

Raymond is smarting when he gets the results of an IQ test that he and Debra (Patricia Heaton) took as part of Robert's criminal-psychology course. Robert: Brad Garrett. Bernie: Tom McGowan. (Repeat).

Ray gets into hot water with Debra (Patricia Heaton) when he tries to deny that he's attracted to a saucy waitress (Tina Arning) at Nemo's Pizzeria. Bernie: Tom McGowan. Nemo: Joseph V. Perry. Suzy: Susan Varon. (Repeat).

Frank (Peter Boyle) believes he has the write stuff when Reader's Digest publishes one of his anecdotes. Ray: Ray Romano. Debra: Patricia Heaton. Robert: Brad Garrett. Marie: Doris Roberts. (Repeat).

After a marital blowup, Marie (Doris Roberts) crashes at Raymond and Debra's, while Frank (Peter Boyle) savors his suddenly single status. Robert: Brad Garrett. Raymond: Ray Romano. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).

Raymond's globe-trotting in-laws (Robert Culp, Katherine Helmond) visit and invite his fusty parents to a fancy restaurant. Frank: Peter Boyle. Marie: Doris Roberts. Debra: Patricia Heaton. Raymond: Ray Romano. (Repeat).

Ray gets dealt into the poker game of his father (Peter Boyle) and his cronies. Garvin: Len Lesser. Stan: Victor Raider-Wexler. Eddie: Murray Rubin. (Repeat).

Feathers are ruffled when Debra (Patricia Heaton) suggests Thanksgiving dinner be held at their house, with striped bass as the main course. Lois: Katherine Helmond. Warren: Robert Culp. Mel: Phil Leeds. (Repeat).

Arthur inexplicably forbids Doug to celebrate or even to acknowledge Halloween, but Doug ignores him and lives to regret it. Kirby: Marshaun Daniel. Davis: Randy Kovitz. Sal: Robert Catrini. Arthur: Jerry Stiller. Doug: Kevin James. (Repeat).

As Arthur prepares to undergo heart surgery, Carrie discovers something that he did years ago that drastically affected her life. Meanwhile, Doug makes friends with a quirky stranger (Chris Elliott) in the hospital and soon regrets it. Dr. Berger: Lenny Wolpe. Dr. Davis: Randy Kovitz. Nurse: Sharon Madden. (Repeat).

Doug and Carrie install a small video camera in Arthur's room without telling him so they can keep an eye on him after he returns home from the hospital. Bill: Frantz Turner. Danny: Gary Valentine. Doug: Kevin James. (Repeat).

Doug and Carrie recall their wedding day and the sign Carrie believes she received from God telling her that Doug was the man for her. Danny: Gary Valentine. Janet: Jenny O'Hara. Joe: Dakin Matthews. Father McAndrew: Joe Flaherty. (Repeat).

Carrie becomes upset with Doug after he grabs a lone oxygen mask aboard a plane rather than give it to her, even though they weren't in any real danger. Also, Spence needs a new place to live, so he tries to persuade Danny to let him move in with him. Elena: Brandy Lopez. Edwin: Inny Clemons. Silvia: Jacqueline Aries. Flight Attendant: Christine Romeo. (Repeat).

Elaine's boyfriend (Patrick Warburton) is too zealous a hockey fan; George ventures saying "I love you"; Kramer has an altercation with a chimp. Sienna: Katy Selverstone. Zookeeper: Raye Birk George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).

Jerry dates Bette Midler's understudy, who gets the call after George injures Bette; Elaine suspects she's being insulted in Korean. Gennice: Adelaide Miller. Kramer: Michael Richards. (Repeat).

Jerry reneges on his pact with George to be more like "grown-up men"; Newman takes care of a barking dog that keeps Elaine awake. Comedian Mario Joyner has a cameo. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. Melanie: Athena Massey. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).

Elaine shares her feelings about George with the wrong person. Meanwhile, George discovers the power of tears. Bruce Mahler. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. George: Jason Alexander. Kramer: Michael Richards. (Repeat).

Ritchie is asked to a dance by his school's most popular girl, which is fine with Christine since it makes her popularity skyrocket, too. Meanwhile, Matthew and Richard try to evict an elderly woman (Marion Ross) from her apartment so they can rent it. (Repeat).

Christine's therapist, Max (Eric McCormack), tries to get her to not give up so easily when circumstances turn difficult and attempts to teach her how to follow through with commitments. (Repeat).

Christine sets Richard up on a blind date with a woman (Jennifer Grey) from her gym. Meanwhile, Richard's friend (Dave Foley) tries to get Christine to go out with him. (Repeat).

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Opie entertains Helen's niece (Mary Ann Durkin) and quickly discovers---to his dismay---that she's more gifted than he is in athletics. The episode kicked off the series' seventh season. Billy: John Reilly. Opie: Ronny Howard. Helen: Aneta Corsaut. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

Howard attempts to join a private men's lodge in Mayberry, but one of the members mysteriously blackballs him. Howard: Jack Dodson. Mrs. Sprague: Mabel Albertson. Goober: George Lindsey. Jud: Burt Mustin. (Repeat).

The barbershop quartet seeks a replacement when Howard gets sick, and Andy believes his best bet is his current prisoner, Jeff Nelson (Hamilton Camp), a chicken thief who has an urge to run. Sheriff Wilson: Ken Mayer. Jud: Burt Mustin. Wally: Blackie Hunt. Tom: Sam Edwards. Johnston: Vernon Rich. Kelly: Harry Arnie. (Repeat).

Andy umpires a championship baseball game between Mayberry and Mount Pilot and gets an earful when he calls Opie out at home plate to end the game, with what would have been the tying run. Opie: Ronny Howard. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Goober: George Lindsey. (Repeat).

A former stripper headlines a visiting USO troupe. First of two parts. Alan Alda, Harry Morgan, Loretta Swit. (Repeat).

Romances with entertainers highlight the conclusion of a visit by a USO troupe. Alan Alda, Harry Morgan. (Repeat).

A trio of wounded GIs brings more than just medical problems, including a corporal (Joe Pantoliano) with an odd confession to make to Mulcahy. Mathes: Dirk Blocker. Rice: Squire Fridell. Igor: Jeff Maxwell. Mulcahy: William Christopher. David Ogden Stiers made his TV-directing debut with this episode. (Repeat).

The Cartwrights try to end a disabled rancher's dependence on his corrupt hired hand. Ezekial: Claude Akins. Tom: Harry Townes. Ben: Lorne Greene. Adam: Pernell Roberts. Hoss: Dan Blocker. Joe: Michael Landon. Joyce: Dianne Foster. Sheriff: Ray Teal. (Repeat).

Newly tries to prove that a girl is a con woman out to fleece a blacksmith. Celia: Melissa Murphy. Ben Sommars: Cliff Osmond. Martin Blake: Frank Marth. Newly: Buck Taylor. Festus: Ken Curtis. Doc: Milburn Stone. Kitty: Amanda Blake. Cashier: George Petrie. Barney: Charles Seel. (Repeat).

A band of outlaws takes over Dodge City and awaits the arrival of Matt, who is escorting a large shipment of gold. Morgan: Steve Forrest. Kitty: Amanda Blake. Clint: Hank Brandt. Jenny: Charlotte Stewart. (Repeat).

Sam, the bartender, takes an interest in a delinquent boy on probation. Sam: Glenn Strange. Matt: James Arness. Eric Tabray: Michael Burns. Shuffles: Bill Callaway. Louie: James Nusser. Billy Clarke: Timothy Burns. Kitty: Amanda Blake. Gideon Hale: Royal Dano. (Repeat).

Earl Holliman plays a vengeful ex-con and Morgan Woodward a farmer who ran out on him during a robbery years before. Geneva Sargent: Jennifer West. Bronk: Ken Swofford. Tully: Robert Totten. Matt: James Arness. Doc: Milburn Stone. (Repeat).

Andy and Opie make a mess of the house when Aunt Bee leaves for a few days---then work madly to clean up before she returns. Bertha: Hope Summers. Jimmy: Rory Stevens. Opie: Ronny Howard. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Andy: Andy Griffith. (Repeat).

Andy's jealous when a handsome new doctor (George Nader), who seems to have an eye for Ellie, sets up practice in town. Ellie: Elinor Donahue. Barney: Don Knotts. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

Someone in Mayberry is the only living descendant of a Revolutionary War hero---and Barney is certain he's the one. Otis: Hal Smith. Mrs. Campbell: Dorothy Neumann. Mayor: Dick Elliott. Jud: Burt Mustin. Harriet: Isabel Randolph. Elvira: Carol Veazie. Barney: Don Knotts. (Repeat).

A state inspector (Tod Andrews) observes Andy and Barney in action and is surprised by their old-fashioned, but effective, methods. Sam: Ray Lanier. Brady: Willis Bouchey. Ellie: Elinor Donahue. Luke: Jack Prince. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

Ellie transforms a tomboyish farm girl (Edris March) into a head-turning beauty, but the girl's stubborn father doesn't like it. Flint: R.G. Armstrong. Jenkins: Bob McQuain. Ellie: Elinor Donahue. Barney: Don Knotts. Opie: Ronny Howard. (Repeat).

Andy is pressured by heartless Ben Weaver to serve a foreclosure notice to a struggling family living in one of Weaver's houses. Weaver: Will Wright. Scobey: Sam Edwards. Mrs. Scobey: Margaret Kerry. Bertha: Hope Summers. Barney: Don Knotts. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. (Repeat).

Raymond (Ray Romano) and Robert (Brad Garrett) wrestle over the captaincy of their men's league basketball team. Andy: Andy Kindler. Kevin: Kevin James. Dave: Dave Attell. Tom: Tom Paris. (Repeat).

Raymond (Ray Romano) adopts a policy of telling his children the truth about everything---even St. Nick. Ally: Madylin Sweeten. Andy: Andy Kindler. Debra: Patricia Heaton. Frank: Peter Boyle. (Repeat).

Debra (Patricia Heaton) comes down with the flu, so Raymond must take care of the kids. Terry Bradshaw has a cameo. Dr. Hammond: Jack Blessing. Marie: Doris Roberts. Frank: Peter Boyle. (Repeat).

Raymond can't face the fact that everybody thinks Robert (Brad Garrett) is "classically handsome," while he is merely "adorable...like a hamster." Amy: Monica Horan. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).

Debra is floored to learn that their newly purchased used car was Ray's high-school "make-out mobile." Ray: Ray Romano. Lisa: Kristin Bauer. Robert: Brad Garrett. Marie: Doris Roberts. (Repeat).

Raymond learns that he'd inadvertently bought Debra a fake engagement ring years before. Barry Bonds has a cameo. Amy: Monica Horan. Robert: Brad Garrett. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).

When the cable goes out, the Barones gather to play a game that tests their moral character. Cable Guy: Jon Manfrellotti. Raymond: Ray Romano. Debra: Patricia Heaton. Robert: Brad Garrett. (Repeat).

Carrie's boss wants her to ask Doug to be an expert witness in an upcoming case since he needs testimony from a delivery driver, but Carrie fears that Doug isn't the right choice. Pruzan: Alex Skuby. Holly: Nicole Sullivan. John: Michael Blieden. Paul: Michael Crider. Danny: Gary Valentine. Spence: Patton Oswalt. (Repeat).

Doug and Carrie want to conceive soon, but their efforts are hindered when Doug's parents (Jenny O'Hara, Dakin Matthews) visit for Christmas. Holly: Nicole Sullivan. Carrie: Leah Remini. Doug: Kevin James. (Repeat).

Carrie becomes jealous when Doug agrees to be a taste tester for Spence's new girlfriend (Christen Nelson), who is studying to be a chef. Thompson: Michael Kostroff. Spence: Patton Oswalt. Carrie: Leah Remini. (Repeat).

Carrie wants to take Doug salsa dancing to celebrate the anniversary of their first date, but Doug persuades her to go to Atlantic City instead. O'Boyle: Sam McMurray. Rico: Angelo Pagan. Pam: Jan Claire. Croupier: James Wellington. Deacon: Victor Williams. (Repeat).

Carrie persuades Doug to take Deacon to a nightclub to cheer him up, but it's Doug who really gets into the scene. Lila: Iris Bahr. Wendy: Sharon Brathwaite. John: Michael Blieden. Pruzan: Alex Skuby. Todd: Robert Vincenti. Eddie: Bobby DiVito. Deacon: Victor Williams. (Repeat).

A maestro impresses Elaine, jeopardizes Kramer's lawsuit and makes Jerry curious about housing in Italy. Jackie: Phil Morris. Security Guard: Gary Yates. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).

George's involuntary winking is misinterpreted by many, and prompts Kramer to seek a favor from Yankee Paul O'Neill; Jerry tries to hide his distaste for meat from Elaine's cousin (Stacey Travis). James: Brian McNamara. (Repeat).

An Olympic athlete stays at Elaine's; George picks up colloquialisms from Houston Astros execs; Kramer installs a hot tub at his pad. Jean-Paul: Jeremiah Birkett. Wilhelm: Richard Herd. Woman: Susan Isaacs. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).

Cooing between Jerry and his girlfriend irritates George; Elaine runs afoul of a soup vendor; Kramer loses Elaine's armoire to muggers. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. Newman: Wayne Knight. Bania: Steve Hytner. Elaine: Julia Louis-Dreyfus. (Repeat).

Barb, afraid that a marriage proposal is iminent, asks Christine to run interference on her next date with Dave; Richard realizes he must try to woo New Christine if he wants her back. (Repeat).

Christine learns that Ritchie is a school bully, and the discovery leads her to apologize to the woman (Amy Sedaris) she bullied in junior-high school. (Repeat).

Christine attends a Christmas block party, where she learns a surprising secret about her neighbor (Molly Shannon). (Repeat).

Christine tells her handsome therapist (Eric McCormack) that she's in love with him---and his response surprises her. (Repeat).

Paid Programming. (Repeat).

Paid Programming. (Repeat).

Aunt Bee buys a blond wig and becomes the talk of the town---and the object of the new minister's affection. Rev. Leighton: Ian Wolfe. Mrs. Larch: Carol Veazie. Maggie: Ruth Thom. Bernice: Janet Stewart. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Clara: Hope Summers. (Repeat).

The Darlings descend on Mayberry to search for brides for the boys, and an omen convinces them Helen should be among them. This episode marks the final appearance by the Darlings on the series. Briscoe: Denver Pyle. Charlene: Maggie Peterson. Helen: Aneta Corsaut. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Goober: George Lindsey. (Repeat).

After receiving minor injuries in a car accident, Goober moves in with the Taylors and drives everyone crazy with his hypochondria. Dr. Bennett: George Selk. Driver: Sue Taylor. Goober: George Lindsey. Floyd: Howard McNear. (Repeat).

Aunt Bee runs for a seat on the city council against the more qualified Howard, who is supported by Andy. Ella: Ruth Thom. Tillie: Maxine Semon. Howard: Jack Dodson. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Clara: Hope Summers. (Repeat).

A visit by a general's aide (Nicholas Pryor) sparks rumors of the 4077's breakup, causing a rash of odd behavior---even by their standards. Igor: Jeff Maxwell. Potter: Harry Morgan. Margaret: Loretta Swit. Charles: David Ogden Stiers. (Repeat).

Delusional from a high fever, Klinger carries on a running conversation with a deceased GI (Kario Salem) who doesn't feel dead. Hicks: Randal Patrick. Soldier: Jeff Tyler. Klinger: Jamie Farr. Hawkeye: Alan Alda. Potter: Harry Morgan. Written and directed by Alda, whose teleplay was nominated for an Emmy Award. No laugh track was used in this episode. (Repeat).

The arrival of a notorious colonel gives Margaret cause for self-evaluation; Hawkeye's eyes are opened to a nurse he's never noticed before. Col. Bucholtz: Peggy Feury. Kelly: Kellye Nakahara. Webster: Deborah Harmon. Sandler: Perry Lang. Lacey: Rita Wilson. Lt. Geyer: Gary Grubbs. Igor: Jeff Maxwell. Margaret: Loretta Swit. Written by Alan Alda. (Repeat).

Halloween festivities are interrupted by wounded and a Marine brawl that spills out of Rosie's. Pvt. La Roche: George Wendt. Cpl. Hrabosky: Andrew Clay. Pvt. Scala: Richard Lineback. Pvt. Grotty: James Lough. MP: Herman Poppe. Soldier: Arlee Reed. Driver: R.J. Miller. Marine: Terry Brannon. Mulcahy: William Christopher. Hawkeye: Alan Alda. Directed by Charles S. Dubin. (Repeat).

Pretty Regina Darien persuades Adam to escort her wagon train on a treacherous journey west. Ben: Lorne Greene. Hoss: Dan Blocker. Joe: Michael Landon. Darien: Larry Gates. Bord: Dennis Patrick. Sheriff: Ray Teal. (Repeat).

Marshal Dillon travels to New Mexico to track down a wily killer who specializes in murdering lawmen. Chato: Ricardo Montalban. Dillon: James Arness. Mora: Miriam Colon. Mrs. Cooter: Peggy McKay. Marshal Cooter: William Bryant. (Repeat).

A stranger arrives to settle an old score. Matt: James Arness. Doc: Milburn Stone. Kitty: Amanda Blake. Festus: Ken Curtis. Garth: Tom Skerritt. (Repeat).

Richard Kiley plays a bounty hunter who has struck it rich. His prisoner is the son of a wealthy rancher; his plans involve blackmail. Matt: James Arness. Doc: Milburn Stone. Kitty: Amanda Blake. (Repeat).

Vera Miles plays a doctor who distresses and ultimately charms Doc when she answers his ad for a temporary replacement. Barnaby: Arch Johnson. Ellen: Dee Carroll. Christina: Lisa Gerritsen. Matt: James Arness. Festus: Ken Curtis. Frank: Glenn Redding. (Repeat).

The suspicious habits of a shy farmer (William Schallert) living outside of town convince Barney that the man is a criminal. Barney: Don Knotts. Floyd: Howard McNear. Otis: Hal Smith. Opie: Ronny Howard. (Repeat).

Barney accidentally arrests a dangerous criminal, who vows he'll break out of prison and return to wreak vengeance. Brooke: Barney Phillips. Barney: Don Knotts. Ellie: Elinor Donahue. Thelma Lou: Betty Lynn. (Repeat).

Guitarist Jim Lindsey (James Best) returns home bragging about his accomplishments, but Andy discovers Jim's really singing the blues. This episode marks the final appearance of Ellie (Elinor Donahue). Floyd: Howard McNear. Mayor Pike: Dick Elliott. (Repeat).

Aunt Bee believes Opie's frequent visits to the sheriff's office are negatively affecting him, so she forbids him to visit Andy at work. Bee: Frances Bavier. Barney: Don Knotts. Otis: Hal Smith. (Repeat).

Opie must find the courage to face up to a bully who keeps taking his lunch money---and Andy must find the courage to let him. Sheldon: Terry Dickinson. Opie: Ronny Howard. Aunt Bee: Frances Bavier. Andy: Andy Griffith. (Repeat).

Barney resigns from the force and becomes a door-to-door salesman, after deciding Andy's out to replace him with a young lawyer interning at the courthouse. Rogers: Mark Miller. Barney: Don Knotts. Thelma Lou: Betty Lynn. Clara: Hope Summers. Emma: Cheerio Meredith. (Repeat).

Debra (Patricia Heaton) accuses Raymond of being a "total pessimist," so he promises to try focusing on the brighter side of life. Former manager Tommy Lasorda guest stars with sportscaster Marv Albert. (Repeat).

Raymond finds a stray dog that he gives to Robert (Brad Garrett). It's to make up for a puppy he had to get rid of years ago because of his allergies. Phyllis: Patience Cleveland. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).

Neighbors, upset with Ray's irksome parents (Peter Boyle, Doris Roberts), demand a powwow at his house, where his mom and dad stumble upon the meeting. Mack: Lance E. Nichols. Lilly: Cathy Ladman. (Repeat).

A radio psychologist (Mary Kay Adams) wants to interview Debra for a book on the American family, but finds the rest of the quirky Barones more interesting. Football's Desmond Howard has a cameo. (Repeat).

A flashback shows how Ray and Debra (Patricia Heaton) wound up living across the street from his parents (Doris Roberts, Peter Boyle). Robert: Brad Garrett. (Repeat).

Ray (Ray Romano) goes on TV for the first time, and he's anything but an unqualified success, according to his loved ones. Roy Firestone and James Worthy appear as themselves. (Repeat).

When Ally (Madylin Sweeten) develops a stubborn streak, Debra convinces Ray to attend parenting class, where they learn a behavioral technique that works on both the child and her grandparents. (Repeat).

Doug and Carrie plan a trip to New Orleans after finding a check for $1500 stashed away in an unused wedding gift. Unfortunately, the check is from 1995, so they try to get Doug's annoying cousin (Peter Scolari) to write them a new one. Marcia: Susie Essman. Lee-Anne: Rebecca Metz. Don: Steven Rozic. Sanjib: Alex Dodd. (Repeat).

Doug and Carrie play golf with Deacon and his new girlfriend (Angelle Brooks), who quickly tees off Carrie with her nonstop laughter at the guys' jokes and her perfect swing. Holly: Nicole Sullivan. Tina: Zilah Mendoza. Kirby: Marshaun Daniel. Deacon: Victor Williams. (Repeat).

Doug's Uncle Stu (Gavin MacLeod) offers to bankroll his nephew's dream of opening a sandwich shop, but Carrie isn't convinced it's a good idea. Danny: Gary Valentine. Young Doug: Tyler Hendrickson. Raji: Ossie Mair. (Repeat).

Doug's parents (Jenny O'Hara, Dakin Matthews) visit while Carrie's on a business trip and they take over running the house, which makes Doug feel like a kid again. Also, Arthur tries to strike it rich by inventing a new type of screwdriver called the Arthur's head. O'Boyle: Sam McMurray. Owen: Bobby DiVito. Jimmy: Jimmy Shubert. Duke: Steve Tancora. Pete: David Applebaum. (Repeat).

Doug serves Carrie after-work cocktails to relax her so she will be less likely to complain when he strays from his diet, but neighbor Lou Ferrigno becomes concerned for her. Danny: Gary Valentine. Carrie: Leah Remini. Arthur: Jerry Stiller. (Repeat).

Doug tries to persuade Carrie to stop wearing her hair in a bun so she will look sexier at his upcoming high-school reunion, but she refuses. Holly: Nicole Sullivan. Dave: Benjamin John Parrillo. Jimmy: Jon Curry. Miss Mancini: Lisa Long. Miss Berman: Angee Hughes. (Repeat).

George dines with Elaine's boss; Jerry's sleeping foot costs him a commercial; Kramer gives traffic advice to firemen. Peterman: John O'Hurley. Fred: Fred Stoller. Captain: Wayne Tippit. Leapin' Larry: Lewis Arquette. (Repeat).

An acquaintance latches on to Jerry; George objects to Susan's relationship with his pals; Kramer's new phone number brings many wrong numbers. Ramon: Carlos Jacott. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. Newman: Wayne Knight. Elaine: Julia Louis-Dreyfus. (Repeat).

Elaine holds a monopoly on the contraceptive devices that Susan prefers; Kramer refuses to wear a ribbon on his AIDS walk. Lena: Jennifer Guthrie. Billy: Scott Patterson. Susan: Heidi Swedberg. (Repeat).

Kramer is overprotective of a friend who had a breakdown after dating Elaine; a former neighbor is leery of George's mental stability. Lloyd: Matt McCoy. Deena: Mary Jo Keenen. (Repeat).

Christine's ex-boyfriend Mr. Harris (Blair Underwood) returns, causing friction with her new love, Max (Eric McCormack). (Repeat).

Richard and New Christine make plans for the arrival of their baby. The situation makes Christine envious, so she asks Richard to help her become pregnant. Dr. Volk: Tim Meadows. (Repeat).

Christine's business becomes suddenly profitable, and she must decide whether to spend her newfound wealth on herself or donate it to charity like Barb did. Pastor Ed: Ed Begley Jr. (Repeat).

Debut: Comedienne Roseanne Arnold plays "domestic goddess" Roseanne Conner---housewife, mother of three and factory worker. First up: Roseanne deals with complaints that her daughter (Sara Gilbert) barks in school, and then finds that her husband didn't fix the plumbing. Dan: John Goodman. D.J.: Sal Barone. Becky: Lecy Goranson. (Repeat).

Dan and Roseanne agree not to spend any of Dan's $500 advance on themselves. Roseanne Arnold, John Goodman. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. Booker: George Clooney. (Repeat).

The Conners' dinner conversation during a night out without the kids is sprinkled with tidbits about a friend's divorce. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. Dan: John Goodman. Patsy: Patricia Gaul. Becky: Lecy Goranson. (Repeat).

Roseanne is caught in an emotional tug of war between her feuding husband and sister (John Goodman, Laurie Metcalf), while Darlene has a bone to pick with D.J. (Michael Fishman). Roseanne Arnold, Lecy Goranson, Sara Gilbert. (Repeat).

Dan and Roseanne enter a songwriting contest; Booker (George Clooney) unleashes impulses in Jackie. Roseanne Arnold, John Goodman. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. Becky: Lecy Goranson. (Repeat).

Bowling night finds Roseanne checking out Becky's boyfriend, while Jackie and Booker make a bet with high stakes. Chip: Jared Rushton. Crystal: Natalie West. Sylvia: Anne Faulkner. Pete: Ron Perkins. (Repeat).

Roseanne discovers that Dan had a one-night stand with her high-school nemesis years ago. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. Becky: Lecy Goranson. (Repeat).

Roseanne and Jackie help Crystal (Natalie West) drown her sorrows over breaking up with her lover by taking her to the Lobo Lounge for a few pink squirrels and a pep talk. Booker: George Clooney. Savannah: Frances Fisher. Juanita: Evelina Fernandez. (Repeat).

Dan's birthday bash at the Lobo Lounge is interrupted by a bully (Eric Allan Kramer) who picks a fight with Dan at the pool table. Roseanne Arnold, John Goodman. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Dwight: Bill Sadler. (Repeat).

Saturday at the Conner home finds Dan and his pals tuning up Dan's truck, while Roseanne and the gals discuss Jackie's dating life. Dwight: Bill Sadler. Crystal: Natalie West. Freddie: Bill Pentland. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. (Repeat).

Dan can't bear to part with the "junk" Roseanne wants to donate to the PTA rummage sale; Darlene forges a passing grade on her report card. Roseanne Arnold, John Goodman. Booker: George Clooney. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. (Repeat).

Roseanne and Dan plan a real honeymoon; Becky (Lecy Goranson) refuses to dissect a frog in biology class; Darlene finds her paper route to be more than she can handle. Attleroy: Gary Bayer. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. (Repeat).

Peggy gets a surprise on her boyfriend's birthday. (Repeat).

Mike moves in with Molly and her family and has to adjust to living with only women. (Repeat).

Mike loses his will power when he buys a 1957 Chevy Bel Air, despite Molly's desire to save money for their wedding. (Repeat).

Mike makes things worse when he tries to mediate a fight between Molly and her family. (Repeat).

Mike reluctantly attends a Halloween party hosted by Molly's boss. (Repeat).

Carl sets his sights high when he attempts to get a date with an extremely attractive woman, played by Holly Robinson Peete. (Repeat).

Mike talks his mom into getting a job, never thinking it will interfere with Molly's life. (Repeat).

Mike cheats on his diet and then tries to keep it a secret from Molly. (Repeat).

Molly asks for Mike's help when she feels overwhelmed by Thanksgiving preparations and wedding planning. (Repeat).

Molly hears upsetting news at work and it steals away her Christmas spirit. (Repeat).

Carl faces his fear of commitment when his relationship with Christina takes a serious turn. (Repeat).