2024-08-17
Doug is determined to continue wearing a new cologne even though Carrie hates it, and the two prepare to celebrate their 10th anniversary. Arthur sneaks Spence and Holly into a movie theater in an effort to pay off money he owes them. Traci: Torrey DeVitto. Kate: Andrea Savage. Usher: Mookie Barker. (Repeat).
Carrie hires a non-English-speaking maid after she realizes that she now makes more money than Doug, two things that irritate him to no end. To get back at her, he hires his own maid, who turns out to be not exactly made to order. Veronica: Anne Meara. Inez: Zilah Mendoza. (Repeat).
George finds a new romance---in a women's prison; Kramer buys a chicken, then puts his fowl to foul use; Elaine encourages her shaved-headed beau to grow back his hair. Celia: Andrea Bendewald. Kurt: John Michael Higgins. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).
Kramer's girlfriend disrupts his sleep; Jerry's parents think he needs financial aid; George ponders an inheritance. (Repeat).
Kramer arranges to die with dignity; Jerry learns his tennis consultant is a lousy player; George becomes obsessed with responding to an insult long after the fact; Elaine offends her video advisor. Milos: Mark Harelik. Shellbach: Ben Stein. (Repeat).
Gang members protest George's handling of a scholarship named for Susan; some find Jerry's new girlfriend objectionable; Peterman wants Kramer's life experiences for his own autobiography, written by Elaine. Ellen: Christine Taylor. (Repeat).
When Christine shows no interest in an election and Richard chastises her about the example that sets for Ritchie, she realizes that she needs to be more politically involved. Audrey: Sandra Bernhard. Edmund: Patrick Breen. Dot: Tara Karsian. (Repeat).
Christine accidentally sends an embarrassing e-mail about Mr. Harris---which was supposed to go only to Barb---to all of the parents at Ritchie's school. Christine also learns that Richard's friend Tom (Dave Foley) has a crush on her. (Repeat).
Christine fears Richard will mess up a remodeling job at Lindsay's house, thus ruining their reputation at Ritchie's school, so she stops by to check up on him. Of course, she makes things worse. Also, Christine and Richard disagree over which one should talk to Ritchie about sex. (Repeat).
Christine goes to a college buddy's wedding with Richard and Barb. Unfortunately, the bride is jealous of Christine because the groom won't stop talking about her. Making things worse for Christine is the fact that she agreed to be the designated driver and can't drink. (Repeat).
Lending money to pal Arnie (Tom Arnold) comes easily for Dan, but he believes that borrowing from family only adds up to disaster. Dan: John Goodman. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Darlene: Sara Gilbert. (Repeat).
Roseanne decides it's time to give Becky "the talk," unaware that it's Darlene who needs it more. Brian: Matt Norero. Dan: John Goodman. Gary: Brian Kerwin. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. (Repeat).
Roseanne lands a waitressing job at the mall restaurant where Becky and Darlene hang out. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. Dan: John Goodman. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Darlene: Sarah Gilbert. (Repeat).
An ultimatum from Gary is the last thing Jackie needs while she's laid up with a career-threatening injury. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. Nurse: Louisa Abernathy. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. Dan: John Goodman. (Repeat).
Dan and Roseanne get a new bed, but it's no bed of roses when they meet Becky's beer-drinking date. Mark: Glenn Quinn. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Dan: John Goodman. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. Jackie: Laurie Metcalf. (Repeat).
Disguised as a lumberjack for Halloween, Roseanne learns about machismo while befriending some braggarts. Pat: Guy Boyd. Arnie: Tom Arnold. Davey: James Pickens Jr. Andy: Robert Miranda. Crystal: Natalie West. (Repeat).
Dan wants out when the PMS monster visits Roseanne, who's trying to plan a surprise party for her husband. Crystal: Natalie West. Arnie: Tom Arnold. Dan: John Goodman. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. Darlene: Sara Gilbert. (Repeat).
Becky gains popularity at school after flashing a defiant hand gesture, but it's mom who's called to meet with the principal (Dann Florek). Anne Marie: Adilah Barnes. Secretary: Judith Jordan. Becky: Lecy Goranson. (Repeat).
Dan is in for a nightmare when Roseanne, who has doubts about his fidelity, meets the woman of his dreams. Marge: Patrika Darbo. Carl: Ritch Shydner. Crystal: Natalie West. Dan: John Goodman. (Repeat).
Dan and Roseanne set a curfew for the girls, then slip out to a motel---leaving the family to fear the worst. John Goodman, Roseanne Arnold, Laurie Metcalf, Sara Gilbert. Becky: Lecy Goranson. D.J.: Michael Fishman. (Repeat).
During a visit from her mom (Estelle Parsons), Roseanne realizes that her mother considers her to be merely ordinary. Roseanne Arnold, Laurie Metcalf, Sara Gilbert. Becky: Lecy Goranson. Dan: John Goodman. (Repeat).
Dan's dad (Ned Beatty) visits; Roseanne plays matchmaker for a customer (Stephen Wesley Bridgewater) and Crystal. Part 1 of two. Crystal: Natalie West. Dan: John Goodman. Roseanne: Roseanne Arnold. (Repeat).
Darlene's wedding day proves an occasion for Dan to have an urgent heart-to-heart with his daughter. Darlene: Sara Gilbert. David: Johnny Galecki. Dan: John Goodman. Nana Mary: Shelley Winters. Scott: Fred Willard. Bev: Estelle Parsons. (Repeat).
Mike's promise to be home in time for Christmas Eve dinner hits a bump in the road when he and Carl wind up going for a joyride in the back of a stolen truck. Meanwhile, Molly gets peeved at Vince when he messes with the family's holiday traditions. (Repeat).
Mike engages in a little innocent flirting with a rookie policewoman and then begins to feel guilty when she reciprocates. (Repeat).
A letter from his financially strapped parents in Africa leaves Samuel contemplating a return to his homeland. (Repeat).
When Molly learns it's been more than 10 years since her husband's seen a doctor, she badgers a reluctant Mike to get checked out. (Repeat).
Molly runs into a roadblock in the form of her publisher, who wants her to make a provocative rewrite in a section of her book. (Repeat).
When Joyce refuses to take a Breathalyzer test at a DUI checkpoint, Mike is forced to arrest her. (Repeat).
The prospect of an empty house for the weekend has Mike and Molly in a state of excitement. (Repeat).
The not-so-retiring Peggy suddenly announces she's leaving her job and Molly scrambles to throw her a retirement party, but wonders just why Peggy is calling it quits. (Repeat).
It's an exciting new chapter in Molly's life as the newly minted author's book comes out, but she becomes obsessively worried that no one will purchase it and begins to haunt the website, constantly refreshing it to see how many copies are being sold. (Repeat).
Peggy's juicy past proves to be fertile ground for Molly's second book, but the author discovers it's quite a chore to get her mother-in-law to fess up. (Repeat).
As a reward for reaching his weight-loss goal, Mike makes what may prove to be a bad decision. (Repeat).
Mike's a bit put out when Molly doesn't allow him to attend a party thrown by her publisher. (Repeat).
To research her latest book, Molly takes Mike's mother on a road trip to the latter's small hometown in rural Missouri, where Peggy has an encounter with her estranged sister. Back at home, Mike and Vince bond while fixing a water heater. (Repeat).
Marie and Debra team up to write a glowing family Christmas letter that makes them both look great, but Ray, Robert and Frank don't like the way the ladies portrayed them in it. Marie: Doris Roberts. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).
Ray decides to become more involved with making decisions around the house, with disastrous results. Contractor: Mark Edward Smith. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).
Everyone is feeling merry around Frank and Marie's fireplace during a snowstorm until Debra unintentionally insults Frank and hurts his feelings. Amy: Monica Horan. Frank: Peter Boyle. Debra: Patricia Heaton. (Repeat).
Ray takes an instant disliking to Ally's troop leader (Amy Aquino) and becomes determined to sell more troop cookies than her to win the top prize, which is a beach chair and umbrella. Mom: Arnetia Walker. Frontier Girl: Hunter Grey. Mook: Nicholas DiNardo. Ally: Madylin Sweeten. (Repeat).
Robert becomes furious with Marie after she ruins his "lucky suit," which he was going to wear to an interview with the FBI. Agent Garfield: Sam Anderson. Secretary: Carole Gutierrez. Robert: Brad Garrett. Marie: Doris Roberts. (Repeat).
Kramer becomes the spokesman for a woman George wants to avoid; Jerry's bookie welches; a co-worker mistakes Elaine for someone else, who's reported as a problem worker. Mike: Lee Arenberg. Peggy: Megan Cole. (Repeat).
Jerry has an accident with his girlfriend's toothbrush; Elaine crams herself into a restaurant's delivery boundary; Kramer alters his "adopted" highway. Jenna: Kristin Davis. Woman: Seriah Carol. (Repeat).
Elaine's review of a film loses her friends; a woman mistakes George for her boyfriend; Jerry visits his parents in Florida. Izzy: Lloyd Bridges. Danielle: Chelsea Noble. Blaine: Todd Jeffries. Morty: Barney Martin. George: Jason Alexander. (Repeat).
George crafts a place to nap at work; a new beau gives Elaine a mattress, which Kramer promptly soils; Jerry's kitchen is redesigned against his will. Hal: Vince Grant. Conrad: Stephen Lee. Wilhelm: Richard Herd. Kramer: Michael Richards. (Repeat).